January 7, 2009 - Warzone XIII

[The Council]

>>>>>> PARENTAL ADVISORY <<<<<<
This program contains adult language and mild nudity. Parental guidance is suggested.

Jessica Swift – Hello everyone and welcome to another edition of Ultimate Wrestling Association Warzone. I’m Lead Commentator, Jessica Swift, and to my left, is my broadcast partner-------

Irvin Fury – ---------You set yourself up each and every time you start the show off. Allow me to introduce myself, my name is Irvin “Come here baby, I have a piece of rock candy for you to lick on, I don’t want to know your name, I only want us to get our freak on. I’ll take em black, white, orange, and yellow, so I’m not hatin’ racial, because they all can suck my cock and get one helluva facial” Fury.

Jessica Swift – I can hear the FCC calling Alexia right now.

Irvin Fury – And they probably want to pay my fine for trying to get into my pants.

Jessica Swift – Everyone, tonight we have a 4 great matches, that could tip the balance of power in the Ultimate Wrestling Association. First, new comer, Anthrax, will be taking on the guy who wants to be the leader of Tommy Polo’s Polo Security Agency.

Irvin Fury – That’ll never happen. Anthrax is a mystery and Redemption is a weirdo, so that match should be for entertainment purposes and a bathroom break.

Jessica Swift – Next, Cake Boy Mary will be taking on UWA Heavyweight Champion, The Grand Mystique in a non-title match. This is a match The Council made to scout where both men currently stand in the rankings of UWA. We all know The Grand Mystique is the current champion, but many say his days are numbered already.

Irvin Fury – After hearing what Cake Boy Mary had to say this week for this match, I think he stands a chance at winning; but I sincerely hope he doesn’t. Just imagine, Cake Boy Mary as a number #1 contender. That would make the presses of all wrestling promotions across the globe.

Jessica Swift – Why? Because he’s different?

Irvin Fury – No, because he’s gay…….

Jessica Swift – We’ll so see The Masked Grappler, Noah Hanson, and a special match between DJ Styles and Red Solomon, amongst other UWA superstars tonight.

Irvin Fury – Sounds exciting.

Jessica Swift – It is, so lets get up to the ring.

[The Council]

The fans are on their feet as "The Game" by Motorhead begins to play.



*** Ally Winters ***
This is your opening match and it is scheduled for on fall. Your referee is Sarah O'Doyle. Introducing first from The Mosh Pit, weighing in at 240 lbs, standing 6'4" he is ANTHRAX!

A man looking like Super Dragon down to the T to a loud positive reaction from the audience. He looks down, does a silent prayer, and then points to the sky. He walks down silently, until he gets into the ring. He jumps onto the turnbuckle, and with both hands, points up, and a bolt of lightning comes down onto the beginning of the ramp, setting it on fire with pyro.

*** Irvin Fury ***
WHAT THE HELL!? SUPER DRAGON WORKS HERE?! This is gay like our next match.

*** Jessica Swift ***
He's not Super Dragon. It's Anthrax, our newest signee from Alexia Valentines' Superstar Initiative.

*** Irvin Fury ***
Well he stinks and I don't like him!

As "The Game" dies down, Redemption stumbles out, bleeding form his head as blood flows down from his mask. Jake Titan walks out behind him with a pair of brass knuckles and tosses hits him in the face again. Redemption spins around, and Jake hits him with a kick ala King Leonidas. He rolls around a few moments, and Jake lifts him up and tosses him into a set of steel steps. Redemption lays there trying to get his act together, Anthrax stands tall in the ring waiting for his opponent. Titan comes down, reaches under the ring grabs a steel chair and smashes it over his back.

*** Irvin Fury ***
OH HELL NO! BULL SHIT! You better stay away form you! I kicked your ass once already and I'll kick your ass again. Don't make me get out the perswader.

*** Jessica Swift ***
Can you ever spell "Persuade", Irvin?

*** Irvin Fury ***
YEAH!... Umm... P-E-R-S-W-A-D-E, Perswade.

*** Jessica Swift ***
Yeah that's what I Thought. Sit down.

Fury sits down, and Jake hits a chair-to-steps con-chair-to on Redemption. He stops moving, and Jake finally tosses him in head first. Sarah has the bell toll, and Anthrax stands him up. Tosses him into a corner, he lands hard and he gets plowed down by a full body splash followed up by a Bulldog ala CM Punk. Anthrax tries to finish this quickly, sets him up for a powerbomb, and nails a Ganso-Bomb he calls GONE. Redemption holds his neck, and Anthrax flips him over and covers him. ONE... TWO... THREE! Sarah calls for the bell and "The Game" begin playing. She raises Anthrax's hand up in victory. The crowd goes berserk because of the beating followed up by a quick match.

*** Ally Winters ***
Here is your winner by pinfall, ANTHRAX!

As Anthrax enjoys his first victory in the ring. Jake Titan stalks Irvin Fury around with the brass knuckles. He grabs a Polo Security Agency member and has him stand in front. Fury’s microphone is killed but knowing him he's probably dropping racial slurs and other derogatory comments to Jake Titan. He smacks Fury across his cheek with his free hand and Fury falls over almost ready to cry. Titan begins laughing as a fan tosses him a beer. He catches the beer, cracks it open and begins drinking. Jessica laughs looking down at Fury enjoying his misery. Titan pours the beer into his mouth but a lot of it gets all over his face. He raises the beer up and "Welcome to New York" begins playing as Anthrax takes his last bow out with a defeated Redemption being helped to the back.

Someone else tosses a beer at him, be catches it and begins chugging the beer ala Stone Cold. Armed with two beer cans he tosses them at Fury getting his crotch wet as if he peed himself. Jake begins laughing again, pointing at him. Ultima-Tron 9000 even shows it to the whole crowd and they begin laughing at him. He walks over grabs the microphone and heads into the ring with a third can of beer and the microphone.

*** Jake Titan ***
Look at that everyone. Irvin "I'm going to fuck everybody’s father" Fury pissed his pants seeing me come down here and kick some ass on my way out. You ain't so high and might now ain't ya bitch!

The crowd cheers on for him until one man shows up to "Gangsta Gangsta" by N.W.A.



*** Ronnie D ***
What be crackin'
Redemption is slackin'
When the time comes for a winner to be said
Redemption will be found at home laying in bed
There is no one better
Than Ronnie D for that matter
Jake Titan is a chasing Irvin Fury
I guess that leaves us to be the jury
Now Alexia Valentines left me out of the show
I guess we all know, that someone is a hoe
Jake Titan is clearly she
Now for Irvin Fury I'm coming for you B.

*** Jessica Swift ***
YOU GOT HIM TO DEFEND YOU!? I THOUGHT YOU SAID HE SUCKED! Come on Fury, just apologize for your racist comments and your smart ass mouth, and maybe Jake will let bygones be bygones.

*** Irvin Fury ***
Bisexual? ALL RIGHT! Let me go find Chesty McChesterson since i heard she goes both ways. But to answer your first point, he's not defending me. He just finds that Jake Titan not hangin' on "da hood" rappin' be a real jive thing Taylor-look-a-like.

*** Jessica Swift ***
What did I say about that!! Also I said BIGONE NOT... you're not worth the effort.

Ronnie D makes his way down to the ring and wraps his chain necklace around his hands and cautiously slides in. Jake Titan looks at him and begins laughing again, Ronnie attempts a clothesline but once more Titan is better than the "thugs" Fury sends his way. He tosses him into the ropes and hip tosses him on the mat. "Welcome Home" begins playing and Derek Wellings makes his first appearance in several weeks. He marches down to the ring, and Titan hunches over welcoming him on. Derek jumps onto the edge of the ring ala Brock Lesnar and into the ring ala Randy Savage. Jake raises the microphone up to speak and the crowd stays behind him.

*** Jake Titan ***
Last time I saw your punk ass, you put me through two flaming tables. I've healed up a lot better since then Derek. I'm going to kick your ass *points to Wellings* I'm going to kick his ass *Points down to Ronnie D* then I'm going to kick YOUR ass *he points to Fury*

Titan tosses the microphone out of the ring and Derek immediately pounces on him with stiff clubs. Titan fights back and the two brawl through the ropes onto the floor beating the Hell out of each other, both men quickly suffering busted lips. Ronnie D slides out of the ring, goes under the ropes and pulls out a Tigers Claw Fist Weapon. He attaches it to his hand and sneaks behind Jake Titan and slashes his back. He screams trying not to move his arms much but Derek runs over and nails a Back Cracker on him. Fury begins jumping up and down for joy from his seat.

Ronnie walks over and begins trimming the head of Jake Titan MUCH to the disappointment of the crowd. Derek holds him in a Full Nelson and allows Ronnie D to bust him up some more. Fury sits back in his chair as angry fans pelt the ring in garbage. Swift sits next to him, dressed to kill calmly takes in everything. Derek hits Titan with a Full Nelson Slam on the cement and both men go under the ring and pull out lighter fluid and matches.

*** Jessica Swift ***
I can take a guess that you're behind the lighter fluid being under there no doubt.

*** Irvin Fury ***
I'm not saying I put it there unlike the last couple of times when that inbreed found it and used it on Tin Man, but I'm just saying you find the WIERDEST SHIT under the ring.

Ronnie D sets up the table, douses it in liquid gas then sets it a flame. Derek lifts Titan up on the clear opposite side of the ring after dragging Titan face down across the ground into a Power Bomb position, and shows him how Army Strong he is through the burning table. Fury smiles, leans back and puts his hands behind his head. Ronnie D and Derek raise hands as the crowd boos them once more. Derek walks over and gives the microphone to Ronnie D once more as he gets to the ring. Derek however leaves from ring side being pelted with trash.

*** Ronnie D ***
Awwww, poor Jake Titan
He once again, goes down fightin’
Ain’t no way in hell you goin’ to win this battle
Shit hurts like riding a horse bareback without a saddle.
Why you continue to fuck with Irvin?
You should know he’s smarter than you
You’re going at it all alone
While he builds up his crew.
Burns all over your face and body
It really sucks to be you right now
Irvin’s Crew stands victorious
While you cry the tears of a clown.
Medics, get this trash out of the ring
He’s really stinkin’ up the place
As a matter of fact, stay out of UWA
We don’t want to see your ugly face.
Derek Wellings really put a number on you
That, I must admit
And in the back, we’re building a casket big enough for you
And we want to see if you will fit.
Next time we trash you, we intend to kill you
So let this be one final warning, from Ronnie D and Irvin’s Crew.

Medics come rushing down and remove Jake Titan from the ring as "Gangsta Gangsta" plays out and Ronnie D leaves with a huge smile on his face.

*** Irvin Fury ***
All right, excellent. Jake Titan is once more thrwaited by my geniousness.

*** Jessica Swift ***
I bet you cannot spell "Genius" or "THWARTED" if I gave you a dictionary. At least say them right Irvin. Folks, I apologize about his inability to speak right tonight. We'll be back after this commercial break.

The screen fades to black as Ronnie D showboats to the crowd once more.



COMMERCIAL BREAK

[The Council]

* Warzone returns with the fans anticipating the next match. The fans are standing up and the atmosphere is getting a little more electric. Two well known combatants are about to square off and it’s about a matter of respect. *

Jessica Swift – Welcome back fans, as you can see, the fans are really riled up for this next match. It’s the old school legend, The Masked Grappler taking on the arrogant Noah Hanson.

Irvin Fury – Noah Hanson, all week has said that Grappler is a boring wrestler and that when he witnesses his promos and matches, it makes him want to slit his wrists.

Jessica Swift – No he didn’t.

Irvin Fury – He might as well have said it. I don’t like Grappler all that much, but his matches are somewhat entertaining. He has a lot of drama surrounding him right now and that equals entertainment. I love to see people suffer…..

Jessica Swift – I bet you do. Just like Grappler is suffering through injured ribs and hand. He’s a true legend by still going out here tonight and taking on such a competitor in Noah Hanson in his condition.

Irvin Fury – I hope Grappler does slap the Iron Claw on Hanson so we won’t have to hear his pompous mouth ever again.

Jessica Swift – Let’s get down to the ring……

Ally Winters – The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, hailing from Cincinnati, Ohio, and weighing in at 234 pounds, he is the “Golden Era Classic”…………….THE MASKED GRAPPLER!!!!

* “Last Night When We Were Young” by Frank Sinatra plays for a while, giving an old school vibe off into the arena, settling everyone. Then the curtain moves a bit and then the masked superstar of the Golden Era of professional wrestling makes his way down the aisle. He is surrounded by fans that jump the railing and rush him because they love him. He walks his way up to the ring and slowly walks up the steps, grimacing in pain due to his rib injuries. Before he enters, he wipes the soles of his boots off on the apron to show respect for the canvas and then enters the ring. He takes off his robe, exposing his taped up ribs and showing his hand that’s also heavily wrapped up. He paces around the ring while slapping at his arms and shoulders and then he tests out the ropes waiting for his opponent. *

Jessica Swift – He’s so brave for being out here tonight. He doesn’t look like he should be, being wrapped up and all.

Irvin Fury – He’s a modern day mummy.

Ally Winters – And his opponent, hailing from Kansas City, Kansas and weighing in at 237 pounds………..NOAH HANSON!!!! The referee will be Jim “Old School” Mills.

* "Breakstuff" by Limp Bizkit blares as Noah slowly makes his way to the ring insulting a few fans along the way. He slides under the bottom rope and then climbs to the top rope and gives the fans the finger. *

Irvin Fury – No respect for anyone……

Jessica Swift – Reminds me of a certain, Ivan Bartholomew Simpson.

Irvin Fury – Ivan Simpson is no more, it’s now Irvin Fury.

Jessica Swift – OK, Mr. Simpson.

Irvin Fury – OJ is in jail.

* The bell rings and the two circle around the ring and then lock up. Hanson backs TMG into the ropes and then hits a shoulder thrust to the ribs that send the old timer through the ropes and onto the apron. Hanson pulls him up by his mask and headbutts him, then drags him over to the corner and tries to slam his face into the post, but TMG blocks it and slams Hanson’s head into the turnbuckle. TMG enters the ring and goes for a clothesline, but Hanson ducks it and counters with a belly to back suplex. Hanson then drives his elbow into the ribs of TMG and starts grinding away at him. TMG is wincing in pain as Hanson is being vicious with the rib attack. Hanson gets up and stomps on the ribs of TMG. TMG rolls into a corner and tries to pull himself up but Hanson rushes him and hits a knee lift to the ribs and then hammers him to the back, causing him to stumble into the center of the ring. When he turns around, Hanson takes him down with a well placed dropkick. Hanson hooks the leg for a pin attempt: 1………..2………TMG kicks out. Hanson measures TMG and connects with a forearm shot to the side of the head, whips TMG to the ropes and then locks on an abdominal stretch to work over the injured ribs of the old school legend. *

Jessica Swift – An abdominal stretch, one of the more basic moves a wrestler can do to inflict major damage.

Irvin Fury – Basic wrestling is a lost art, Jesse. So many guys nowadays want to flip and flop all over the ring just to show off and look pretty. All that fancy stuff may look good, but it won’t get it done when it’s needed. But this stuff here, stuff like the abdominal stretch and headlocks, that’s what makes your opponent cry uncle.

Jessica Swift – I bet you got put in tons of headlocks coming up, eh, Fury?

Irvin Fury – I was the one applying the headlocks.

Jessica Swift – I bet you don’t know the different between a headlock and a lip lock.

Irvin Fury – Lip locks are my specialty, right up there with headlocks……. and I love getting headlocks, only when lips are involved.

Jessica Swift – Why did I ask?

Irvin Fury – And I told you………

* TMG is struggling to break the hold as he reaches out to the ropes and Hanson stops him cold by jabbing his pointed elbow down into the ribs and grinding it. TMG is screaming in pain but musters the strength to toss Hanson over, but Hanson lands on his feet, hits the ropes and hits a battering ram right into the sternum of TMG. TMG is holdings his chest and ribs, rolling around on the mat as Hanson pins him: 1………..2……….TMG kicks out again. Hanson pulls him up and hits a forearm to the head, knocking him into a corner and Hanson begins to work over the rib area with punches and hits several shoulder thrusts. Hanson sends TMG into the opposite corner, and when he bounces out, he charges and surprises Hanson with a running knee lift. The crowd goes nuts as TMG connects with one of his finishing moves but he can’t recover because he falls back away from his opponent. *

Jessica Swift – Big move by The Masked Grappler but he can’t get over to pin his opponent.

Irvin Fury – That running knee lift came out of nowhere. He usually gets the pinfall after hitting that move, but in this case, fate isn’t on his side.

Jessica Swift – The sound of his knee slapping Hanson across the jaw was astounding. It sounded like a gunshot.

Irvin Fury – Jake Titan is here? After what he did at the last show, he should be put to sleep.

Jessica Swift – He slept Virus and Polo, that’s for sure. But they will be here tonight to provide their own special commentary on the final two matches for the evening.

Irvin Fury – You mean we get the night off early?

Jessica Swift – Yes it does.

Irvin Fury – Wanna come over to my dressing room and rub my back and feet?

Jessica Swift – I’ll rub your back and feet, yes……….

Irvin Fury - *surprised* You will……….!!!?

Jessica Swift – Yeah, with gasoline…….so I can set you on fire.

Irvin Fury – Psycho bitch.

Jessica Swift – Your mamma.

* The crowd is stomping, trying to rally TMG. He is crawling over to a downed Hanson, reaches over him and pins him: 1…………..2………..Hanson gets a shoulder up. TMG starts to stand up and brings Hanson to his feet. He connects with a knife edge chop, sends him to the ropes and hits a back elbow. He struggles to bend over to pick Hanson up as he places the sole of his boot on the face of Hanson and pulls on his hair. TMG literally pulls a handful of hair out of Hanson’s scalp, causing his head to smack the canvas. TMG drops a knee into the head of Hanson, then he starts pounding away at his head with a closed fist. Referee Mills warns TMG of using a clenched fist and he stands up and places Hanson’s head between his legs, holds him upside down and hits a piledriver. The jarring motion causes pain to TMG as he’s holding his ribs and kicking in pain. Jim Mills is counting both men down: *

Jim Mills – 1…………..2……………3…………..4…………..5…………6……….

Jessica Swift – Both men are down and Grappler is the most hurt. He really can’t take any type of shocking blow to the ribs.

Irvin Fury – With injured ribs, it truly limits his mobility and his ability to pull off, even some of the most basic moves.

* …..Hanson pulls himself up with the help of the ropes and stumbles over to TMG. He stomps on him and hits a jumping leg drop. He hooks the leg for a pin: 1………2…….TMG fights out of the pin. Hanson gets up, bounces off the ropes and goes for an elbow drop, but TMG rolls out of the way and gets to a knee. Hanson is rubbing his elbow as he gets up and charges TMG, but gets caught with a shot to the gut. TMG starts fighting back with punches to the midsection, then hits another knee lift, sending Hanson flying back into the ropes. TMG rushes him, chops him a few times, sends him to the opposite ropes and hits a shoulder tackle. Hanson stays down, TMG hits the ropes, Hanson leaps up and leap frogs TMG, TMG hits the ropes as Hanson drops down again, TMG hits the ropes and when Hanson stands, TMG connects with a axe handle blow to the chest. Hanson hits the mat and rolls out of the ring. TMG follows after him but Hanson hits him with a Pele-style kick to the head as he exits. TMG crumbles to the arena floor as Hanson stomps his ribs even more. He drags him over to the ring steps and places his damaged hand in-between the ring post and the steps. *

Irvin Fury – This is going to hurt.

Jessica Swift – This is going to be horrible. Noah Hanson is systematically taking The Masked Grappler apart.

* Hanson kicks the steps into the hand of TMG, causing him to let out a big scream in pain. He crumbles to the floor, holding his hand. Hanson curses the booing crowd and rolls TMG back into the ring. Hanson pulls TMG’s hand out and hits a double knee stomp to the hand followed by a corkscrew legdrop to the head. He hooks the leg for a pin: 1…………..2………..TMG barely escapes. The crowd is starting to get behind TMG as they stomp and clap, making it sound like thunder in the Staples Center. Hanson continues to curse the crowd and kicks TMG in the back. It awakens TMG as he stiffens up and puts his hand in the air. Hanson grabs the hand and starts biting it and the crowd boos. *

Jessica Swift – Low down dirty tactics by Noah Hanson to turn the tide of this match.

Irvin Fury – If he wants to put something in his mouth, I have plenty………freakin’ bastard.

Jessica Swift – You never said why you don’t like him so much.

Irvin Fury – It’s an aura about him. It’s just something that even though I have my moments, he takes the cake.

Jessica Swift – And right now, he’s treating Grappler’s hand like cake.

* Referee Mills is counting Hanson to break the illegal biting. Hanson releases and hammers TMG to the back to the back of the head. He pulls him up, but TMG hits a shot to the gut with his taped up hand and then hits a European uppercut. Hanson is back holding his jaw as TMG tries to pick him up with a body slam but his ribs can’t take it. Hanson connects with a snap suplex to bring violent impact to the rib area. Hanson then applies an armbar and drives his knee into the ribs of TMG. TMG is kicking to grab the ropes with his feet and does so to break the hold. Hanson goes to pull TMG up, but TMG back body drops him over the top, but he lands on the apron. TMG turns around and Hanson drops him throat first across the top rope. TMG is down in the center of the ring as Hanson goes to the top rope and goes for the Ladykiller but TMG rolls out of the way at the last moment, causing Hanson to crash to the mat. The crowd is getting up again and TMG is getting pumped up. He unwraps his hand and tears a piece of tape off and then wraps it around the throat of Hanson. The crowd is cheering for the cheat tactics of the old school legend. *

Irvin Fury – Fighting fire with fire. Grappler may be a fan favorite, but he knows all the tricks of the trade.

Jessica Swift – He better be careful and not get disqualified. This is a wonderful match and I don’t want to see it ruined because someone got disqualified.

Irvin Fury – What are you insinuating?

Jessica Swift – Oh nothing. Just your favorite wrestler loves to take the easy way out when he’s in trouble.

Irvin Fury – There’s nothing wrong with taking the easy way out of a trouble. Grappler is going to do it because he’s going to lose, but I just hope he wins.

* Referee Mills is counting TMG to stop using the tape. TMG discards the tape and chokes Hanson from behind. Referee Mills is warning about choking and as he’s trying to pry the strongest hands in the world (Guinness Book of World Records proven) from around the throat of Noah Hanson. As Mills is out of position, Hanson kicks back into the groin of TMG, causing him to falls back and before he hits the mat, Hanson executes a hangman’s neckbreaker. The finger markings of TMG remain on the throat of Hanson as he’s trying to gasp for air. He storms over to TMG kicks him to the back, pulls him up and headbutts him to the back of the head. TMG wobbles into a corner where Hanson lifts him up onto the top turnbuckle backwards. Hanson climbs up with him and goes for a belly to back suplex, but TMG elbows him down and stands up on his own. He gingerly turns around and when Hanson looks up, TMG dives off and connects with a big high cross body press. He goes for the cover: 1…………2……….Hanson kicks out. TMG is holding his ribs as Hanson makes it to his feet as TMG does, swings, misses, and TMG kicks Hanson in the gut, puts him up on his shoulders and does an Airplane spin. The crowd is cheering the old school move, as TMG is going as fast as he can. *

Jessica Swift – The Masked Grappler is digging deep into his bag of tricks to get some kind of offense in. He realizes that with his injuries, he can only do so much, and with his experience, he knows how to find the ring move to pull off so he won’t hurt himself.

Irvin Fury – That’s one thing I admire about the Grappler…..

Jessica Swift – What’s that…..?

Irvin Fury – Nah, I really don’t anything about him…..well, I take that back. He does gets lots of ass. He has a ton of children and by different woman I may add.

* TMG continues to spin around then he dumps Hanson onto the mat. The crowd claps as TMG stumbles around the ring and tries to regain his composure as he digs down to pick up Hanson, but Hanson rolls him up into a small package: 1……………2………..TMG escapes. Hanson is still groggy and trying to feel his way around the ring when TMG gets up, measures him and then locks on a nerve hold. The world’s strongest hands is now digging deep into the pectoral muscle of Hanson, bringing him to his knees. Referee Mills is asking if Hanson wants to quit, but Hanson shakes his head ‘No’. He starts to get up to his feet then he starts kicking back into the shins of TMG, stomps on his feet, causing TMG to release the nerve hold, he hits the ropes and TMG catches him with a belly to belly suplex. TMG starts to take down the straps of his singlet and starts stomping his foot on the ground, then he executes the Garvin Stomp, finishing up by stomping on Hanson’s face. He then pins him: 1…………2…………Hanson gets a shoulder up. *

Jessica Swift – These two are dragging it out as if a title is on the line. This is one of the better matches in UWA history.

Irvin Fury – If Hanson thinks Grappler is boring on the promo front, then he’s mistaken about his in-ring ability. I must say, Grappler is a polished wrestler who’s world traveled and I don’t think Noah Hanson should have taken him lightly.

Jessica Swift – You’re right about that. But Grappler is badly hurt with those busted ribs and hand. Hanson focused most of the match on those points and it’ll be a matter of time before those injuries start to take their toll.

Irvin Fury – I’m sure they’ve already taken their toll. I’ve seen better matches from Grappler…..

* TMG can’t believe it and he pulls him up, sends him to the ropes and locks on a sleeper hold, but Hanson reverses it by countering with an elbow to the gut, hits the ropes and hits a dropkick. Hanson is slow getting up and he pulls TMG to the center of the ring, then he climbs up to the second rope and connects with a leg drop. He goes for the pin: 1…………..2………TMG kicks out again. Hanson starts slapping the mat in frustration. He picks up TMG and hits a rib breaker but he holds onto TMG, using his strength, he connects with another rib breaker, then he dumps TMG onto the mat. TMG is writhing in pain as Hanson exposes his damaged hand and repeatedly stomps it. TMG is rolling around in so much pain, Referee Mills is about to call the match. *

Irvin Fury – This is brutal. Jim Mills is about to call this match off.

Jessica Swift – Grappler won’t like that one bit. He’s got to allow him to fight back.

Irvin Fury – No way. He’s hurt real bad and Noah Hanson is about to do some real damage. This match has to be stopped.

Jessica Swift – It’ll be a travesty if it does happen.

* TMG is pulling at the shirt of Jim Mills not to stop the match. Hanson pushes Mills out of the way and continues his assault on TMG. He knees him to the face and hammers him with a clubbing blow to the head. TMG is reaching up for assistance and Hanson kicks him to the ribs again and places his boot under his chin and chokes him. Mills is counting Hanson to break the illegal choke and Hanson stares him down. Hanson is in full control of the match as he stands TMG up in a corner and chops him across the chest. TMG can barely stand as Hanson lifts his head back up and chops him again. Hanson takes one of the straps from his singlet and chokes TMG, then flings him to the center of the ring. Hanson sits TMG up, kicks him to the back 3 times, hits the ropes then dropkicks him to the back of the head. TMG can barely defend himself as Hanson walks around the ring with his arms up, taking in all the boos from the crowd and he ducks a flying shoe. *

Jessica Swift – You’d think Ronnie D or George Bush was in the ring, with shoes flying.

Irvin Fury – This is Los Angeles, not Iraq………well, with all these Mexicans around, it might as well be Iraq.

Jessica Swift – Shut up, Fury. You’ll get us in trouble.

Irvin Fury – Me? How can my mere words get us in trouble? Worry about your hub cabs still being on your car when we leave tonight. Or how about seeing one of those guys crossing the border and hiding in your dog house in the back of your house? Worry about that……….

Jessica Swift - …..GRRRRRR!!!!

* Hanson finds the shoe, fakes as if he’s going to toss it back to the fan, but he hits TMG with it instead. TMG is trying to get up, Hanson runs and is surprised by TMG when he slaps on The Iron Claw. The crowd explode with cheers as TMG has the move semi-locked in with his weakened hand. *

Jessica Swift – IRON CLAW!!!! IRON CLAW!!!!

Irvin Fury – YES!!!! This could be the beginning of the end for Noah Hanson.

* Hanson somehow breaks the Iron Claw, kicks TMG in the gut and hits a running knee lift to the face. TMG is flat on his face as Hanson picks him up once more, hits a rib breaker and then ascends to the top rope. TMG is trying to get up, but he really can’t move. Hanson points down to him, dives off and connects with the Ladykiller elbow drop to the rib area. TMG is floundering around, holding himself and Hanson hooks the leg for the pin: 1………………….2……………….3!!!!! The bell rings….. *

Jessica Swift – Noah Hanson just took apart The Masked Grappler.

Irvin Fury – The Masked Grappler was taken apart a few weeks ago. Noah Hanson just finished the job.

Ally Winters – THE WINNER OF THE MATCH…………….NOAH HANSON!!!!!

* Hanson looks to ascend to the top again, he looks out at the crowd and Jim Mills, who’s trying to stop him. Hanson jumps over Mills and connect with another Ladykiller to the ribs. The bell continues to ring as Hanson is standing over his fallen opponent. TMG is not moving as Mills is pushing Hanson out of the ring. The crowd boos as Hanson raises his own arm in victory, as he exits the ring. As Hanson is leaving, Dan McCloud makes his way down the aisle and comes face to face with Noah Hanson. They are having words that can’t be picked up on camera. *

Jessica Swift – Now this is the time where he shows his alliance and friendship to Grappler. Dan McCloud needs to rip into Noah Hanson for that extra he gave after the match.

Irvin Fury – I’m no lip reader, but I don’t think McCloud is out here to start a fight with Hanson. I think he enjoyed watching Grappler get beat like a disobedient dog.

* The two start to agree on something then Hanson walks off, to the back. McCloud enters the ring and stands over his “friend”. Suddenly, the crowd erupts as Nemo, the youngest son of The Masked Grappler runs down the aisle and slides into the ring, surprising McCloud. Nemo turns McCloud around and starts slugging away at him, much to the delight of the fans. *

Jessica Swift – NEMO IS HERE!!!!

Irvin Fury – He’s in way over his head. McCloud will tear him to pieces.

* McCloud finds an opening and knees Nemo to the gut, bends his arm behind his head, exposing his chest, and hits him with a heart punch. The 9 year old Nemo, is floundering around on the mat, holding his chest. TMG jumps up and tries to help his son, but McCloud kicks him in the ribs, lifts him up and locks on the Octopus Stretch. *

Jessica Swift – THE OCTOPUS STRETCH!!!!

Irvin Fury – If a strong elbow to the broken ribs of Grappler isn’t enough, then the squeeze of the Octopus Stretch should do him in. His friend, Daniel McCloud is showing him what a true friend does………

Jessica Swift – That’s not a friend, Dan McCloud is not a friend of The Masked Grappler.

* TMG is screaming in pain as McCloud is wrenching with the submission hold and repeatedly driving his elbow down into the ribs of TMG. TMG stops moving as the PSA rush into the ring and pull McCloud off of his “friend”. TMG plops onto the mat face first, as Nemo tries to save his father. The crowd boos as McCloud is pushed out of the ring and he has a sick smile on his face. *

Jessica Swift – I can’t believe we saw what we just saw. Dan McCloud not only assaulted a 9 year old, again, he also added insult to injury and further drove a wedge into the friendship between he and The Masked Grappler.

Irvin Fury – I don’t think Dan McCloud wants to be friends. There’s no explaining what’s going on between these two.

* Nemo is cuddling the head of his passed out father as the crowd boos. Nemo is crying as McCloud looks back and stands on stage, as two of his “girlfriends” come out onto stage to join him, arm in arm. One hands him a glass of champagne and his smoking pipe. He enjoys what he sees in the ring as Warzone fades to commercial break. *

Jessica Swift – This is insane.


COMMERCIAL BREAK

[The Council]

* Warzone returns to show Irvin Fury making faces at the camera then he realizes that they are back on the air. *

Irvin Fury – Oh, pardon my professionalism. Many of you who watch Ultimate Wrestling Association and follow what’s going on with Pro Wrestling Council as a whole, all know we like to dig in the crates and show you all matches and other events in e-fed history that inspired the creation of Pro Wrestling Council and UWA. Tonight, we have another treat, or should I say travesty, as we will show a JWA:EWA Extreme Zone World Heavyweight Championship match between Double H the Hardcore Hitman and the Champion, The Rattlesnake. The reason why I say this match is a travesty is because there were some backstage politics going on and The Rattlesnake wanted to have things his way or there would be no way. It was Extreme Zone 28, May 11, 2004 and I was there to call the action with sidekick, Dean Malenko. When the night was over, there was plenty of people pissed off at the events that have taken place in, out, and around the ring. So lets show what happened and lets just hope nothing like this ever happens in UWA.

* The footage starts to play on the Ultima-Tron 9000 and everyone starts to look at it. *

BLAST FROM THE PAST

Dean Malenko – It’s time for the main event. Double H versus The Rattlesnake Steve Austin.

Irvin Fury – My sources have been pretty ‘silent’ about this match.

Dean Malenko – Silent?

Irvin Fury – Yeah, you know, silent. Quiet, unvoiced, unspoken, hushed, didn’t know you were even there, silent.

Dean Malenko – Oh, silent.

JWA:EWA WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHP

[/color]

Patrick Lombard – The following contest is for the JWA:EWA World Heavyweight Championship, with a special guest referee………….Eugene!!!

* Eugene comes out to the stage with his theme music. He waves at all the fans and has on a referee’s shirt. His tights has an extra bulge in the front. He waves at all of the fans as he makes his way down the ramp and tries to climb the cell. The ringside crewmen have to pull him down from the cell and tell him to enter the cell. *

Eugene – Me, no monkey. Me, man.

Crewman #1 – Yes, we know you are a man. You are a referee to, get in there. Go.

Eugene – Me, referee. 1, 2, 3?

Crewman #2 – That’s right.

Eugene – Good. You wanna see my boo-boo?

* Then Eugene pulls his tights down and exposes his swollen nut sac. Both crewmen tell him to pull his tights up. He pulls them up and enters the cell. He continues to wave at all the fans. *

Patrick Lombard – Introducing first, the challenger, hailing from Parts Unknown and weighing in at 225 pounds………Double H, the Hardcore Hitman.

* Won’t back down by Feul begins to play and Double H makes his way down to the cell without his security force. *

Irvin Fury – Looks like Double H is a bit naked. No security force?

Dean Malenko – You heard the commissioner……he banned anyone from being outside of the ring, even the security force.

Irvin fury – What about outside interference?

Dean Malenko – Banned as well. This will be a straight up battle, with a half-wit referee.

Irvin Fury – So you agree that Eugene is a half-wit?

Dean Malenko – His referee skills are of a half-wit. We all know Eugene is special, so I’m not labeling him a half-wit in life.

Irvin Fury – But he is a half-wit in life as well.

Dean Malenko – Leave me alone.

Irvin Fury – Never.

* Double H enters the cell and waits for the champion to appear. *

Patrick Lombard – And his opponent, hailing from Victoria, Texas and weighing in at 255 pounds, a member of The Triple Threat and JWA:EWA World Heavyweight Champion………….The Rattlesnake Steve Austin!!!!!!!!

* The Glass Shatters and The Rattlesnake marches out onto the stage, dragging the belt behind him. The crowd boo’s wildly for the Texas Redneck as he stomps his way down the ramp, grabs a microphone from ringside and enters the cell. He stares coldly at his opponent as he climbs all four corners giving the crowd the Middle Finger Salute. They all boo and salute him back as well. He takes off his vest and gets ready for action. Then he begins to talk. *

Austin – Hey there, Double H (what?). Yeah, um….you’ve waited a long time for this moment (what?). You’ve waited a long time to take it to another level, haven’t cha? (what?) That’s great because as much as I would love to fight cha here tonight (what?)………this is one time (what?) The Rattlesnake Steve Austin is going to ‘lay down’. (what?) *

Dean Malenko – Don’t do that. That’s disgraceful to the belt and the entire company.

Irvin Fury – As much as I disagree with you, I agree on this one.

Austin – The Rattlesnake did some thinking (what?) and I feel like you don’t deserve an ass whippin’. (what?) Oh, oh, you got lucky last time. (what?) I had my mind on defending the title, instead of playing footies with you, when it didn’t matter. (what?) Now that it does matter, I’m not feeling YOU. (what?) The Rattlesnake has other things in life that he has to take care of. (what?) So, here’s what I’m going to do…..

* Austin lays down in the center of the ring, on his back. *

Austin – Now, all you have to do is pin me. (what?) Then you get what you want. (what?) You get another win over me (what?) and you get the most covenant title in all of wrestling. (what?) Don’t worry, my issues won’t hold me back for too long. (what?) I will be back sooner than expected. (what?) So come on, place your grubby little boot on my chest and take the title. (what?) COME ON!!!! Make it easy for Eugene here to do his job. I’m beggin’ ya. PIN ME!!!! (what?)

* Double H has his hands on his hips and is disgusted. He places a boot on Austin’s chest and Eugene makes the count: 3…………………2………………….. *

Austin – Eugene….count from one.

* The face of Eugene lights up and he makes the count the right way: 1…………..2………Double H snatches the microphone from Austin’s hand. *

HH – Austin, you will die in hell for this.

Dean Malenko – This is sick.

* Eugene counts again: 1………………..2……………….3!!!!!! The bell rings. *

Irvin Fury – This was absolutely retarded.

Patrick Lombard - THE WINNER OF THE MATCH, AAAANNNNNDDDDD NNNEEEWWWWW JWA:EWA WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION……………DOUBLE H!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

* The cell begins to rise up and Austin gets up and leaves the ring. Eugene is handed the title belt and places it around his own waist. Then he jumps up on a corner and starts taunting. Double H waits for him to get down, then he tells him to hand over the belt. Eugene does so with a sad look in his eye and begins to leave the ring. Double H turns him around and hugs him. Eugene is happy again and they rise their arms into the air in victory. Double H holds the belt up with one arm and has a look of disdain on his face. *

Irvin Fury – Damn lucky.

* The crowd boo’s Austin as he walks up the ramp and to the back. Then as he passes by through the curtain, Extreme Vision comes to life and shows Batista smiling and shaking hands with Commissioner Regal, who is still laying down on his desk with a heating pad on his back. *

Batista – Thank you very much Commissioner, I will not let you down.

Regal – I have faith in you Mr. Batista. I believe you will make a great champion.

Batista – Oh, yeah. Double H, if you didn’t know, I just struck oil. That’s right, I’m going to be a rich man next week, because I just got granted my wish. I got granted a title match against you for the belt that doesn’t deserve to be around your waist. The Demon against you, the paper champion. How do you like me now?

Regal – Oh, and I forgot to tell you Mr. Batista…….you’re title will be on the line as well.

* The crowd cheers at that announcement. Batista is livid and he begins to trash the Commissioners office. Then he looks into the camera, with a shaking face. *

Batista – DOUBLE H!!!! LET THE SIN………………BEGIN!!!!!!!!!!!

* The show ends with Double H in the ring staring at Extreme Vision. *

END FOOTAGE


[/center]

Irvin Fury – Just like I said, if you understand what happened, then you should be mad. If you don’t understand, then let me put it this way…….Rattlesnake pulled a stunt backstage that basically had him stripped of the title. He wanted to simply hand the title over but Al Powers told him to take the match on his back. Rattlesnake simply did what you witnessed and the rest is history. The part you saw at the end with Batista and Regal, well, Batista went on to defeat Double H at Extreme Zone 29 to become World Heavyweight Champion, only giving Double H at 10 day reign as champion. Many say, if Rattlesnake hadn’t done what he had done, then a climatic battle between he and Batista would have happened and Double H wouldn’t have went down in history as a transitional champion.

Jessica Swift – That’s pretty interesting. JWA:EWA seemed full of drama and suspense. I was in transition myself on becoming a championship wrestler myself in 2004, so I can relate to what was going on.

Irvin Fury – Stuff like that branded JWA:EWA wrestlers as cry babies and spoiled brats. Yet, the company survived for a long time with that type of talent. I didn’t care as long as my pay checks didn’t bounce.

Jessica Swift – I bet you didn’t. Fans, I just got word that Willie Moleman is in the back with a very upset Masked Grappler and Nemo.

Irvin Fury – Damn, he’s not dead yet?

Jessica Swift – Let’s go to the back………

[The Council]

In the back, Willie Moleman is standing in front of The Masked Grappler after his crushing defeat at the hands of Noah Hanson and another sinister attack by Daniel McCloud. He has a towel over his head and his mask is lying on the bench. Nemo is in the corner of the locker room drinking out of a baby bottle and eating fudge stripped cookies.

Willie Moleman: Hello everyone, Willie Moleman here and in the background is a man who has seen many hardships over the past few months. More hardships than he’s ever faced during his entire wrestling career. The Masked Grappler, you have been beaten and battered for several months now, and tonight you looked to be several steps behind in your match against Noah Hanson, a match many believed you should have and could have won. Is there anything you can add to these claims? What is your insight?

The Masked Grappler doesn’t look up. He continues to look down towards the floor. His body is still taped up, the tape on his hand and wrist are tattered, dirty, peeling, and exposing the discoloration of his injured hand. His right leg jitters, a sure sign of frustration. Then in his old, grizzled voice, he speaks……

Masked Grappler: You want to know my insight? I’ve seen this world turn for ages. I respected those who I encountered during my journey’s around this planet and never had a problem with anyone that wasn’t billed to face me in a wrestling ring. Now, the times have changed. I’m the elder and the young ones don’t respect or heed advice. They want to learn their way, and usually their way is the hard way. Without guidance, they are blind and will soon crash into a wall that won’t budge. Then there’s those who claim to walk the same path as those better than thou and when they see a chance to replace you, they will come up with anything to do so.

Willie Moleman: Are you referring to Noah Hanson and Daniel McCloud?

Masked Grappler: I’m referring to Jason Verve, Derek Wellings, Noah Hanson, Christopher Powell, DJ Styles, Quincy Forde, Kevin Jones, Leon Roberts, and all the other young whipper-snappers of the world. They need direction in their lives or they will burn in a fiery heap; there’ll be no career to even salvage. Then when it comes to those who walk the same line as me……

Grappler’s upper body bounces up and down as if he’s laughing within himself.

Masked Grappler: ….we all know what I mean when I say that. I’m referring to Daniel McCloud, the self proclaimed oldest living legend of professional wrestling. Yes, he was ONCE a friend; and a friend he is no more. My aging back can no longer hold up a career so inflated with lies and bravado, that it’s becoming so obvious to the people that he wants to be me.

Willie Moleman: Are you sure that’s what it is? McCloud seems like a great guy.

Masked Grappler: Are you serious, William? A great guy? He’s been attacking me for weeks now, and for what? Me telling the truth? You’ve known me for a long time and you’ve never known me to be a liar and to blow my own horn.

Willie Moleman: No you haven’t.

Masked Grappler: So where did this guy come from to warrant any type of accolade? In all honesty, he’s a fraud, a phony and looking through these old eyes, I can see right through him. He emulates me by having many females, when in my lifetime, I’ve sired many children with many women. He claims our paths have crossed over the years, when THEY HAVE NOT!!!! This is my message to the world; Daniel McCloud is a phony and he wants to take out your favorite old school wrestler. He wants to replace what can not be replaced. I’m sick and tired of people telling me that he’s copying me, every aspect, every fabric that is The Masked Grappler.

Willie Moleman: I just don’t understand Grappler.

Masked Grappler: It’s not that hard to understand, William. You will see for yourself soon enough and look at what he’s already done in UWA and read up on my history. He wants to be me, he wants to replace me. That’s the only way he’ll ever gain any sort of recognition…….so he believes. He knows he’ll never make it on his own without taking something or everything from the very first professional wrestler ever. He’s a dopple-ganger; a blatant image and character infringer and impersonator. If he wants me gone, then we shall one day meet face to face and we shall see who’s the better man. My change in attitude is attributed to what he’s done to me over these few months and I’m not putting up with it any longer. He will……..

Grappler looks up with the towel covering his eyes and nose, only exposing his mouth.

Masked Grappler: …..feel the Iron Claw.

Nemo: Dad?

Nemo takes the baby bottle out of his mouth and waves it in front of himself.

Nemo: All gone. No more.

Masked Grappler: That’s good, son. That’s real good. Anything else, William?

Willie Moleman: We saw you take on Noah Hanson and you lost. What do you have to say about that?

Grappler puts his head back down.

Masked Grappler: The pain that’s shooting through my body right now is unbelievable, William. As you know, I don’t take drugs for anything, not for sicknesses and injuries. All these things heal on their own and this is just another one of those things. But the pain threw my concentration off and I was allowed to be taken apart by a crafty veteran. I will say that Noah Hanson did his job. He pounced on me and focused on the things he needed to do to win. It’s not to say that when I get healthy, we will meet again and the result will be different. Noah Hanson, celebrate this victory today, but tomorrow, it will be a different story. But remember, your victory has a little star next to it, because the man you beat tonight, will certainly not be the man you face in the future.

Grappler points to the door; Moleman looks and knows that’s his cue to leave.

Willie Moleman: Thank you for your time, Grappler. This is Willie Moleman, and Ultimate Wrestling Association Warzone will return after these messages.


COMMERCIAL BREAK

[The Council]

* Warzone returns from commercial break with Jessica Swift and Irvin Fury. *

Irvin Fury – So I swallowed that turkey bone and felt it floating around in my stomach. I drank milk and ate 3 eggs trying to pass that damn thing and nothing came about but gas.

Jessica Swift – That’s TMI, Fury.

Irvin Fury – Just wanted to give a brief medical history.

Jessica Swift – And we are history fans. Tonight, we are taking off a little early, as we have replacement commentators.

Irvin Fury – There is no replacement for Irvin Fury.

Jessica Swift – I’d enjoy my time with an Emu more than I do with you.

Irvin Fury – Emu’s smell.

Jessica Swift – So do you. Well fans, until next time.

Irvin Fury – Each time, is the first time, if you deal with Irvin Fury.

Jessica Swift – Good night and enjoy the rest of the show.

* Swift and Fury get up and leave the commentator’s table, wave to the crowd and head up the ramp, to the back. Alice Winters makes her way down the aisle and enters the ring. *

Ally Winters – Ladies and gentlemen, we have a special announcement to make. For the rest of the evening, the matches will be called by two special guest commentators. Introducing first……………….LEON “THE VIRUS” ROBERTS!!!!!

* The Lights dim just before the music starts. “Through The fire And The Flames” by Dragonforce begins to play. Once the initial guitar solo ends and the second one begins, Leon Roberts is seen rising up from the stage by platform, as red fog fills the stage. *

On a cold winter morning, in the time before the light
In flames of death's eternal reign we ride towards the fight
When the darkness has fallen down,
and the times are tough all right
The sound of evil laughter falls
around the world tonight

Fighting hard, fighting on for the steel, through the wastelands evermore
The scattered souls will feel the hell bodies
wasted on the shores
On the blackest plains in hell's domain,
we watch them as we go
In fire and pain, and once again we know

So now we fly ever free
We're free before the thunderstorm
On towards the wilderness our quest carries on
Far beyond the sundown, far beyond the moonlight
Deep inside our hearts and all our souls

* Leon walks around the ring, takes his seat at the commentator’s table and raises both arms up in an X formation, as lighting strikes the posts, before they burst pillars of flames. He takes his seat at the table and puts on his headset. *

So far away we wait for the day
For the light source so wasted and gone
We feel the pain of a lifetime lost in a thousand days
Through the fire and the flames we carry on

Virus – That right there was the greatest entrance for a commentator in the history of professional wrestling. If you don’t know who I am, I’m Leon “The Virus” Roberts, YOUR future UWA Heavyweight Champion. Sorry to disappoint my fans because I’m out here doing commentary, instead of busting a few heads in the ring. Thanks to Jake Titan, I took a little fall at the last Warzone and I’m not cleared to wrestle just yet. But I’ll be back in the ring soon.

Ally Winters – And his broadcast partner………….”The Menace” TOMMY POLO!!!!

* “Ain’t No Make Believe” by Stonefree Experience begins to play and Polo comes out to the stage to booing from the crowd. Tracie follows out after him as he ignores the people and flexes on stage. He begins to walk down the ramp and as he walks, pyro explodes behind him on each side of the ramp. They walk around the ring and stand in front of the commentator’s table as Virus is standing and the two stare at each other. Virus takes off his headset and Polo approaches him but Tracie stops him. Virus puts his headset back on and sits down. Tracie takes Polo chair and places it at the end of the table and Polo takes his seat and puts on his headset. *

Tommy Polo – I don’t know who’s the bigger faggot, you or Cake Boy Mary.

* Virus takes his cup of water and splashes it into Polo’s face. Polo snatches off his own headset and lunges at Virus but Tracie stops him again. The crowd is getting rowdy as they want to see these two go at it again. *

Virus – Yeah, yeah. Let your bitch hold you back.

Tommy Polo – I’ll let that slide. How’s the throat coming along?

Virus – What’s going on with me is none of your business. Call the freakin’ match and be a bloody good boy, or I’ll have to put you down. Understand, boy?

Tommy Polo – I don’t know who you callin’ boy, but if it continues, I’mma fuck you up.

Virus – Whatever………boy.

Tommy Polo – Keep pressing the trouble button, Leon, and I’ll finish what I started with your neck and rip your head off.

Virus – Empty threats are nothing to me……

Tommy Polo – OK…….try me.

Virus – Better believe I will.

Tommy Polo – Anyway…….potna….what’s the next match?

Virus – Your closet boyfriend, Cake Boy Mary, is going to take on my personal bitch, The Grand Mystique, in a non-title match because he’s too much of a pussy to defend it.

Tommy Polo – I wouldn’t defend my title against that dude anyway. Imagine if he won, he’ll put glitter and skittles all over the belt.

Virus – Haha. Good one, but I think he’ll simply dedicate the win to you and think of all the obscene things you two done together.

Tommy Polo – Tell Demonica not to call me for child support because I ain’t takin’ care of that bitches child. YOU take care of my kid and send me pictures with your progress.

Virus – Go to hell Polo.

Tommy Polo – Hell is sitting next to you being potnas…..potna. Besides, how do you drink and eat with a hole in your neck? Don’t that shit fall out of it?

Virus – Payback is a mutha, Polo. Better believe that.

Tommy Polo – I know payback is a mutha, and I fucked her. So that would make me a muthafucka.

Virus – After getting a close up of Tracie, you’re more of a monkey fucker.

Tracie Bottoms – You better watch it, Virus.

Virus – I did watch it and I want to change the channel.

[The Council]

Ally Winters – The next non-title match is scheduled for one fall, first, hailing from Castro Street in San Francisco, California, and weighing in at 198 pounds………………..CAKE BOY MARY!!!!!

* “It’s Raining Men” by The Weather Girls starts playing as pink, purple, and white lights start to strobe around the stage, as glitter falls from the rafters, showering the entire crowd. Then Cake Boy Mary, dressed in his patented pink diamond encrusted feather robe walks out to the stage waving to the crowd. Men in different outfits such as business suits, road workers, fisherman, football players, police officers, rappers, and gymnasts rush from behind the curtain and surround him. He unfastens the robe belt and drops it to the ground, exposing his outrageous leather and studded short shorts and vest. He starts gyrating on stage ala Rick Rude and then starts giving hard pelvic thrusts as the men run circles around him, feeling up his body. The men circle him once more then head to the back with the last guy picking up his robe and gives Cake Boy Mary a long hard kiss in the mouth. Cake Boy smacks his ass then the guy prances away. Cake Boy makes his way down the ramp by skipping and does the Melina split to enter the ring. Cake Boy jumps up on the top rope and lays there, waiting for his opponent. *

Tommy Polo – He’s disgusting.

Tracie Bottoms – He’s fun to be around. He loves to give beauty tips. Where do you think I learned some of my bedroom tactics?

Tommy Polo - ……wha?

Virus – HAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!!! Hey Polo, your bitch learned to suck you off from a queer. So in essence, you’re getting sucked off by Cake Boy Mary. HAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!!!

Tommy Polo – Yeah? Well at least my woman doesn’t burn rubbers off cocks like yours do. And that baby isn’t yours because when she was out hoeing that night, the line was too fuckin’ long to get up in it.

Virus – Watch your mouth about my unborn child Andreas.

Tommy Polo – That’s not your kid, fool.

Ally Winters – And his opponent in this non-title match, hailing from the deepest, darkest side of the cosmos, and weighing in at 277 pounds, he is the current Ultimate Wrestling Association Heavyweight Champion…………….THE GRAND MYSTIQUE!!!! The referee will be Shane Thomas.

* “Headstrong” by Trapt plays to the arena. After a few seconds the bright house lights go off but the music continues to the arena. The house spotlights come up and are focused on all four corners of the ring. They change colors rapidly. Then the music stops. Then both sides of the entrance ramp, there are five or six short bursts of steam, followed by small firework going off by the Ultima-Tron 9000 screen. The house lights returns and the music starts back up again. GM is in ring, standing on a turnbuckle, dangling the UWA Championship from one hand. He is facing towards the ring with his arms outstretched and back towards the crowd. He then turns holds the title belt over his head and shows it off to the crowd. He then hops down from the corner and starts pacing around the ring, anticipating the beginning of the match. *

Virus – Keep smiling with that belt, Zorro. It’s coming with me sooner than you think.

Tommy Polo – You’ll never win the UWA Championship. It’ll be over my dead body before you do so.

Virus – Oh you know I’ll be happy to make that happen.

Tommy Polo – The only thing that’ll happen is me running you out of UWA and you can watch me hold that belt over my head as I win my first major championship.

Virus – You’ve been in this game for how long, and you’ve never won a major championship? Boy, you really do suck.

Tommy Polo – You know the story, so don’t even try to plant it in the people’s head. When I get close, those fuckers find a reason not to give me a shot or kick me out the fed. I’m not going to cry about it, I just know in due time, the UWA title will be mine.

Virus – Wake up, Tommy……you suck.

* Shane Thomas calls for the bell and the match begins. CBM is standing in his corner thrusting his pelvic area towards GM and motions for him to come to him. GM charges him and goes to kick him low, but CBM dodges and moves to the side. GM charges CBM again and gets hip tossed into the center of the ring and when he stands up, CBM hits a one foot dropkick. CBM gets up and starts a Pride Parade, dropping an elbow to the chest of GM. He then positions himself on top of GM and rubs all around his head and goes to kiss him but GM knees CBM away and rolls into a corner. CBM stalks him and places his crotch into GM’s face but GM ducks and rolls out of the ring. GM is rubbing his face to wipe the dirtiness of GM off of him. *

Tommy Polo – He know he likes Mary’s nuts in his face.

Virus – He likes those nuts in his mouth. I hope Mary softens him up so it’ll be so much easier to beat him for the title.

Tommy Polo – I know, but I hope he at least puts up a fight when I defeat him.

Virus – In your dreams…….choke artist.

* GM is mad as hell and starts kicking the ring steps. GM starts to walk up the steps and CBM grabs him by his head and tries to slam his face into the turnbuckle from the outside but GM blocks it and slams CBM’s face, staggering him. GM then climbs up on the turnbuckle and hits a diving shoulder tackle. He reluctantly covers CBM by hooking the leg: 1……….2……..CBM kicks out. GM pulls him up by his hair, hits a hard forearm shot to the jaw and repeats it several times until CBM can’t stand and drops to a knee. GM hits the ropes and connects with a Yakuza kick to the face. *

Virus – I wonder if Mystique totally destroys this girlie-man, would it be considered “bashing” because of this dude’s preferences.

Tommy Polo – I’ve heard it referred to as that, even though he’s in a damn wrestling match. But once the fairy’s wings are clipped, they consider them vulnerable and should be left alone.

Virus – Fuckin’ bogus. As long as no charges are created, I’ll be happy to beat the crap out this guy.

* GM stomps on the back of CBM’s head and drives several elbows to the back of the cranium. GM then grinds his forearm into the back of CBM’s neck and gives him one good bash before pulling him up and body slamming him. GM picks up CBM, sends him to the ropes, swings and misses with a clothesline, CBM counters coming off the ropes with a Lou Thesz press and begins to hammer away at GM with girlie slaps and punches. Then he rubs his own body and tries to sit on GM’s face but GM bridges out and kicks GM to the back of the head. GM’s eyes are wide with rage as he picks CBM up by the back of his tights and head and slides him out of the ring to the floor. GM exits the ring and hammers CBM with a forearm to the back and body slams him again. GM goes over to a fan who’s holding a CBM sign and dressed like him, snatches the sign and tears it half. The crowd boos as GM spits in the direction of the fans and then slaps one of them. *

Virus – I really like the edge on that punk tonight. Makes me think about respecting him.

Tracie Bottoms – You actually have a brain to think?

Virus – Funny you should ask that, because the only brains Polo has are the ones you swallow.

Tracie Bottoms – Go to hell Virus. Why are you here anyway?

Tommy Polo – Answer my woman chump.

Virus – I’m here to fuck your world up. Hope that’s the answer you were waiting to hear.

Tommy Polo – Nah, it’s not the answer I wanted to hear, but it’ll due for the time being. Because when the time is right……..I’m Xing you out.

Virus – Typical Polo, all mouth, not results.

Tommy Polo – We shall see who has the last laugh.

Virus – I am because your career is one big joke.

* GM grabs the fan and pulls him over the railing and begins to beat him up. The PSA rush down to break it up and pull GM away from the action. CBM pushes through, grabs GM from behind and thrusts, lifting GM off his feet then slamming him stomach first into the apron and repeatedly thrusts GM into his backside. GM then kicks back into the groin of CBM and then rolls him back into the ring. At ringside, a famous celebrity is shown with a look of concern on his face.

The crowd starts cheering when they show George Michael. GM looks around for him but can’t locate him, so he rolls back into the ring. GM pulls CBM up and chops him. CBM lets out a feminine whimper and is laying against the ropes. GM chops him again, sends him to the opposite ropes and spears CBM to the mat. He holds his head up and starts punching away at his head. GM then paces around the ring with his arms up to a bevy of boos from the crowd. He picks up CBM, headbutts him into a corner, then starts to climb up and being a 10-punch combination, but CBM starts feeling his ass and sniffing around for his member. GM hops down and back, as CBM rushes out of the corner, but GM counters with a powerslam. He hooks the leg for a pin: 1…………….2…………CBM kicks out. GM kicks CBM in the back, pulls him up and drags him over to a corner. He pummels him with punches to the head and lifts him up onto the corner. He climbs up with him and executes a superplex. CBM is laid flat on his back as GM rolls over and covers him: 1…………2……..CBM kicks out again. GM then grabs CBM by his head and locks on a rear naked choke. CBM is struggling to break free as GM is squeezing extra hard and CBM’s face is turning purple. *

Tracie Bottoms – I don’t think that’s going to affect Cake Boy Mary. He’ll like Grand Mystique so close and grinding on his back.

Tommy Polo – Kind of like how you like it when we’re in the Jacuzzi with me?

Virus – Please you two, spare me the details of your sex life. I don’t want to hear it.

Tommy Polo – You need to hear something healthy since you haven’t dove in anything human in years.

Tracie Bottoms – Yeah. I wouldn’t say Demonica is a catch------well, she is a catch, if you’re a dog catcher.

Tracie and Tommy – HAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!!

Virus – Suck a fat one bitch.

Tommy Polo – She doesssssooooooohh……sorry, babes.

* CBM is trying to escape the rear naked choke and tries to roll himself over on his stomach. He succeeds and then gets on all fours. GM is surprised as CBM starts to throw his ass back, causing a bucking motion, then stands straight up with GM on his back. The crowd starts cheering as CBM runs backwards and smashes GM into the corner. It has little effect as GM slaps the sleeper hold on CBM, but CBM counters by turning his head and hitting a belly to back side suplex. He’s slow to get up and GM is getting up and goes to stomp on him but CBM catches his foot and pushes him back. CBM kips up and starts thrusting his pelvis at excessive speeds, charges GM and pushes him into a corner. He starts punching him down into the corner with rapid fire punches until his seated. Then he notices GM’s face at waist level, he looks out at the crowd who’s cheering wildly, then GM starts to wind his hips up and then executes the 10-thrust combination to the face of the champion. With each thrust, the back of GM’s head bounces off the turnbuckle and then he is pulled to his feet then he is hit with an Invert. GM is holding himself and hopping up and down. CBM hits the ropes and hits the Smackdown DDT. He goes for the cover: 1………..2………GM kicks out. GM is stunned as CBM picks him up, sends him to a corner, connects with corner back elbows with Vogue poses then hits a suplex. CBM gets up and starts thrusting his pelvis wildly as his fans are snapping their fingers to show their support. *

Tracie Bottoms – Oh, they’re really into this one.

Virus – Is that how they celebrate, snapping their fingers?

Tracie Bottoms – Sometimes they do, but there’s more of them out in this crowd than I thought.

Tommy Polo – We’re in LA, what do you expect?

Virus – True. Why don’t you go out there and join your people Andrea?

Tommy Polo – What do you mean, “your people”?

* CBM climbs up on the turnbuckle and throws his arms up in the air at an angle and hops back down. As he approaches GM, GM pulls his tights and causes him to slam his face into the middle turnbuckle. GM gets up, jumps up and drives both knees into the back of CBM. The crowd groans at the hard move as GM is pissed off. GM turns CBM over and starts beating the living day lights out of him with punches to the head and body. He holds the head of CBM, plants his knees into his ribs and jumps back, but CBM cartwheels out of the Rib Cracker and when GM gets up, CBM connects with a split-legged counter followed by a mule kick. The move knocks GM back into the corner where he climbs up and does the 10-thrust combination again. GM staggers out of the corner and CBM gets behind him and executes Forced Entry, pushing GM into the ropes and falls out onto the apron. He gets up and CBM approaches him but GM grabs his head and snaps it off the top rope. CBM is staggering around the ring as GM jumps up and springboard clotheslines CBM to the mat. GM starts yelling in frustration as he starts pounding on his chest like a gorilla. He sits CBM up, connects with kicks to the chest and back, hits the ropes and hits a dropkick to the back of the head. CBM is holding his head in pain on the mat and is rolling around. GM hooks his leg for the pin: 1…………..2……….CBM kicks out. GM is mad and slaps the mat. He drags CBM to the center of the ring by his leg, stomps on his groin, which prompts the referee to warn him. GM pushes Shane Thomas to the side and ascends to the top rope. He jumps off and goes for the suicide cannonball dive, but CBM gets his knees up and GM smashes into them. He’s holding his tailbone as CBM looks up and turns him onto his stomach and holds him there. GM is struggling to get free, but the shear will and determination of CBM is strength enough to executes Outed. *

Virus – AAARRGGHHH!!!! How embarrassing…..

Tommy Polo – Tell me about. Right now, I feel for Mystique. I don’t want to be him right now, or ever.

* Thrust after thrust, GM tries to break free and CBM is hitting him hard from the back. CBM gets up and he’s standing over GM, gyrating his hips and thrusting his pelvis. The fans are snapping their fingers as they whistle and applaud. As CBM is playing to the crowd, GM turns over and hits a double knee to the groin of CBM and as he’s bending over in pain, GM rolls him up into a small package: 1…………2………CBM escapes. GM gets up and kicks CBM to the face and stalks him as he’s positioning himself behind CBM. As CBM turns around, GM kicks him in the gut, underhooks his arms, but CBM takes his legs out and rolls into a bridging pin: 1………..2………GM barely escapes. GM gets up and tries to kick CBM again but CBM bridges up Matrix style, grabs GM by the face and plants a huge kiss on him. GM is feverishly wiping his lips and then is kicked in the gut, flipped up and over onto the back of CBM, being held up by his head, and then crushed with the Coming Out Party (Widow Maker). CBM then rolls GM over onto his back and lays on top of him for the count: 1…………2……….3!!!! The crowd explodes as the UWA Heavyweight Champion has lost in an upset. The sound of fingers snapping and whistling is heard as the bell rings. *

Ally Winters – THE WINNER OF THE MATCH…………….CAKE BOY MARY!!!!

Virus – I knew that chump didn’t have it in him. He’s so done.

Tommy Polo – There you go. UWA is some shit now that our champion just lost to……….

Tracie Bottoms – CAKE BOY MARY WINS!!!!! YIPPEEEE!!!!

Virus – I’m no business man, but I think this is bad for business. We can’t have this guy in the spotlight. This can’t be possible.

Tommy Polo – It’s no different than when you came to UWA and proclaimed your spot for the title. You’re as big of a bitch as Mary is. At least he doesn’t bleed once a month like you do.

Virus – That’s a good one BALCO. We’ll see in time who’s the better man between us. At least I don’t have to take shortcuts to get out of matches.

Tommy Polo – I got myself DQ’d in that one match because I needed to get away from you. You smell like pure shit and you were making me sick to my stomach.

Tracie Bottoms – Guys, shut up. Cake Boy Mary just beat the champion and he’s celebrating.

* George Michael and all the other people of his kind are celebrating all over the Staples Center. Though he did not win the title, he’s now in line for a shot by default. Cake Boy Mary has his arm held up and has a big smile on his face. A-Rod and Wilcox hurry to the ring, pulls him out and place him on their shoulders. They parade him up the ramp, waving to the crowd as they head to the back. *

Tommy Polo – I can’t believe what I’m seeing.

Tracie Bottoms – Believe it.

* Inside the ring, GM gets up and he’s deeply disappointed in himself. He’s slow to leave the ring, grabs his belt, looks it and heads to the back. The fans are laughing at him and some fans are tossing Skittles and other assorted fruit flavored treats his way. He ignores it as he disappears to the back. *

Virus – And he’s got to face the fans again when he special guest referee’s the main event. I guess this match was booked as an easy win for him, and he fell flat on his face, just like I knew he would.

Tommy Polo – I don’t see how this dude can even come back out here after losing to Cake Boy Mary. He’s a broken man, he’s done.

Tracie Bottoms – What’s next?

Tommy Polo – Me, as UWA Champion……

Virus - *snickering* Yeah right.

Tracie Bottoms – No, I mean, what’s going to happen on the show next?

Tommy Polo – Hell if I know. Ain’t no paper here tellin’ me what to do next.

Virus – We can fight to fill the time in……

Tommy Polo – I’m all for that……..

* The two stand up and the crowd starts to get a little louder. Virus takes off his headset and Polo does as well. Tracie gets between the two to stop them. *

Tracie Bottoms – STOP YOU TWO!!!! You can fight later. Something else is going to happen with this show. Someone in the back, do something………

[The Council]

[The Council]

* Warzone returns from commercial break as Polo and Virus are still talking about the upset victory of Cake Boy Mary over UWA Champion, The Grand Mystique in a non-title match. *

Tommy Polo – I’m tellin’ you now, with that little bitch beatin’ Grand Mystique, UWA is bound to fall. This is the beginnin’ of the end.

Virus – The beginning of the end came when Alexia Valentine signed me and tried to control me.

Tommy Polo – This ain’t about you right now punk. If you want to get a check from UWA, then somethin’s got to change or we’re all goin’ down.

Virus – I have a back up plan, so whatever happens here, I’ll be fine.

Tracie Bottoms – What you mean by that?

Virus – Check around, it’s already laid out there. Virus won’t die when and if UWA does.

Tracie Bottoms – Come on guys, I can’t believe you’re talking about the death of UWA just because Cake Boy Mary beat the champion. Cake Boy Mary is a great wrestler. Just because he’s……

Tommy Polo - ……gay…..?

Virus – Uh, huh…..

Tracie Bottoms – No. He’s different. Just because he’s not all macho and swollen like you two gorillas, doesn’t mean he’s not a man.

Tommy Polo – Tracie, he eats cock meat sandwiches……

Virus – And he eats fudge pie with the finger hole in the middle…….

Polo and Virus – He’s gay.

Tracie Bottoms – Whatever guys. But whatever he is……he’s got a title shot coming his way. What can you two say about that?

Tommy Polo - ….grrrrrrrrrr

Virus – In due time.

* In the back, Cake Boy Mary is celebrating his victory over The Grand Mystique with some of his friends and other wrestlers that will remain unnamed. Clay Aiken of American Idol fame is singing his heart away in honor of Cake Boy Mary. *

* Everyone is having a great time, popping champagne, dancing, playing the wall, kissing, and laughing. Some guys are doing cartwheels and blowing bubbles all over the place. Cake Boy takes a bottle of champagne and guzzles it down. Wilcox starts dancing with him and pulls him close. A-Rod gets behind Mary and they sandwich him, start grinding and balloons start to fall from the ceiling. *

Virus – This is totally out of control.

Tracie Bottoms – That looks like fun. He deserves it. After what Jason Verve did to him and then he came back from that to beat the champion. Imagine what that party will be like if he actually wins the title.

Tommy Polo – You’re like puttin’ him at the top already. That punk got lucky, that’s the bottom line. He wouldn’t be able to beat me on my worst day.

Virus – Everyday is your worst day. You’re one dimensional and bland. You can’t cut a promo and you say the same thing over and over. There’s nothing to you…….you’ve already topped out.

Tommy Polo – You got me twisted, bitch. Ain’t nothin’ on this side bland. And if you a bitch and I repeatedly say it, then that’s what you are…………BITCH!!!!

Virus – BITCH? WHO YOU CALLIN’ A BITCH……….BITCH?!!!!!

Tommy Polo – Your mother ain’t around, so I guess I’m either talkin’ about you or your daddy………bitch…..

* Virus snatches off his headset yet again and they two stand up and are about to fight, but Tracie stops them. Polo grabs a chair and flings it at Virus. *

Virus – HA!!! Missed, just like your career.

Tommy Polo – I ain’t done with you yet…….bitch.

* Back to the party, the drinks are flowing and everyone is having a great time. “I’m So Excited” by The Pointer Sisters is going over the speakers as guys are drunk and falling all over themselves. Some guys are groping each other in the shadows and Clay Aiken is conversing with George Michael. Cake Boy then grabs the member of A-Rod and start to speak into it like a microphone. Everyone starts laughing because he’s drunk and thinks it’s a real microphone. He stands up and stumbles a bit with laughter. Then Clay hands him his microphone and he starts to talk. *

Cake Boy Mary – Thank you everyone for your support. This is such a wonderful thing that has happened and now I’m on top of the world. When I’m granted my title shot and get a chance to face the champion for the title, I will fight with all my heart to win it for all of us.

* The gathering crowd begins to chant his name….. *

CAKE BOY!!!! CAKE BOY!!!! CAKE BOY!!!! CAKE BOY!!!! CAKE BOY!!!! CAKE BOY!!!! CAKE BOY!!!! CAKE BOY!!!!

Cake Boy Mary – Thank you……..thank you.

* The scene fades with more bubbles falling from the ceiling and Cake Boy Mary blowing kisses out to his friends. *

Virus – Absolutely sickening……

[The Council]

* In a room close to where Cake Boy Mary continues his celebration, a dark figure is sitting in a corner. The little light that makes it into the room, glistens off a piece metal. *

Voice – You’ll never escape me. I’ve worked too damn hard for you to desert me for such a person.

* The light disappears and reflects off another area. *

Voice – What happened tonight was a mistake. Whatever that mistake is, it will be corrected.

* The voice gets louder and the sound of glass shattering can be heard on the opposite wall, across the room. Then a ball of lightning can be seen within an orb that’s raised up to light the face of the individual talking. *

The Grand Mystique – That mistake will be wiped clean and everything will start anew. What happened tonight truly was a mistake on my part. There is no explaining what happened but to make sure it doesn’t happen again. The UWA Heavyweight Championship is mine and always will be.

* He holds the belt close to the lightning crystal ball so it can illuminate and glisten. Grand Mystique stares at the belt and the light brightens within the ball. *

The Grand Mystique – Such a beautiful thing. I will not allow it to be tainted by such an individual, Cake Boy Mary. For everything I fought for, can be wiped away by someone like him and his kind.

* The crystal ball starts to glow red. *

The Grand Mystique – Never will that happen. NO!!!

* The Grand Mystique hurls the crystal ball across the room and shatters it against the wall. The remnants of the red glow start to fade within the broken pieces of glass. *

The Grand Mystique – So be it. I must gather myself and forget the irrelevant. There will be no official for the main event, as I will leave it to the competitors, Red Solomon and DJ Styles to settle their differences. I will return when it is required that I return.

* Laughter can be heard through the ventilation shaft from the Cake Boy Mary party. *

The Grand Mystique – That laughter will soon turn to tears if Cake Boy Mary is put in front of me with so much at stake. This title is mine, as I represent UWA and all man. That’s the key word, man. I will not see UWA fall into the clutches of someone like him. I am The Grand Mystique, UWA Champion and there will be a big bang……………

* The light that shows The Grand Mystique’s face fades out and Warzone goes to commercial. *


COMMERCIAL BREAK

[The Council]

UWA Warzone returns live, and Leon "The Virus" Roberts is still there with Tracie Bottoms to his left and Tommy Polo to her right. They have their headsets on as they await the final match. Ally Winters stands in the ring as the opening instrumental of "Waking the Demon" plays out.

*** Leon "The Virus" Roberts ***
Time for the main event. Something you'll never see as a champion unlike me, Pollo.

*** Tommy Polo ***
AH HA HA AH HA HA! THAT SO FUNNY! AH HA HA AH HA HA! Don't think you'll be getting any political favors here bitch. Just because you fucked the hell out of Chesty McChesterson aka Alexia Valentine, doesn't mean you're promised DICK! around here... which is what YOU take on a nightly basis I might add.

*** The Virus ***
I bet you won't say that to my face, lipstick.

*** Tracie Bottoms ***
BOYS! ENOUGH!!! Save it for after the match. DAMMIT!!!

2,3,4

Enough of this,
My eyes are bleeding from the fear that's inside,
To shield your delight from you,
Stop hold my spine,
Don't try to stop me from making this world,
The force giving in,

Waking The Demon,
Where'd you run to?
Walking in shadows,
Watch the blood flow,
There’s always darkness, so don't try and hide,
Nobody's giving in, Walk through the night,
The painful transfer, will look so extreme,
I'm not coming back, With nothing ok,

Pushing out, there’s not going to rip to the foul place you push,
I hoped you but still you die,
Stop hold my spine,
Don't try to stop me from making this world,
The force giving in,

Waking The Demon,
Where'd you run to?
Walking in shadows,
Watch the blood flow,
There’s always darkness, so don't try and hide,
Nobody's giving in, Walk through the night,
The painful transfer, will look so extreme,
I'm not coming back, With nothing ok

The Treacherous Threesome walk out through red smoke and DJ leads the way spread eagle in front of the camera man, Jason Verve and Sherry Martinez make their way ahead of him.



*** Ally Winters ***
This is your main event for the evening. By a ruling made just moments ago by UWA Owner, Alexia Valentine, the stipulations for this match are if DJ Style wins, Red Solomon cannot challenge for the UWA Heavyweight Championship while The Grand Mystique is the champion. If Red Solomon wins, DJ Styles cannot challenge for the UWA Heavyweight Championship while Red Solomon or The Grand Mystique are the champion.

*** Tracie Bottoms ***
Isn’t The Grand Mystique supposed to be referee for this match or something?

*** The Virus ***
You heard him crying a few minutes ago in the back; he ain’t coming back out here. He’s too embarrassed for losing to Cake Boy Mary.

*** Tommy Polo ***
I wouldn’t show my face in LA after losing to that bitch either.

*** The Virus ***
He doesn’t show his face anyway.

*** Tracie Bottoms ***
So who’s going to be the referee?

*** Tommy Polo ***
Ehh, who cares. Just let them go.

*** Ally Winters ***
Introducing first from Martin, GA standing 5'10" tall, he is accompanied by his stablemates in "The Treacherous Threesome" Jason Verve and Sherry Martinez, he is known as "The Emissary of Evil" DJ STYLES!

*** The Virus ***
Good to see DJ Styles has reinvented himself. He's become a mind game player like myself. Get into your opponents head and rape them. Much like I'm doing to you, eh Pollo. He's decided what and who he is with the aid of Sherry Martinez and Jason Verve. He's going to see more main event time than you ever will bitch.

*** Tommy Polo ***
*Sarcastically* Ah ha ha ah ha ha! YOU SO FUNNY! No seriously, you suck. Don't quit your day job as a full time bitch.

*** Tracie Bottoms ***
He did get more focused on his game since he returned coming off his injury with Red. Now they're finally one on one like he's been wanting. Tommy, hold me, this may get good.



Sure enough, The Virus wraps an arm around Tracie’s' shoulder. She picks it up and drops it. Tommy looks right at him eye to eye, and he smiles back; using more "subtle" tactics. "Waking the Demon" continues as Treacherous Threesome continue their way to the ring, they threaten fans as they make their way down. DJ and Jason climb up the steps, and pull Sherry up to the ropes by her arms. They hold the ropes open for her, and she places one leg in, bends over in front of Jason giving him a sight he enjoys to see. DJ climbs in before Verve and they stand on opposite sides of her facing one another. She drops down to her knees rubbing their lower stomachs before sliding up. She bites Jason on his neck and a little blood seeps out. She faces DJ and spits Verves' blood into his mouth. The crowd is both in shock and booing. The song dies down then Georgian chanting begins and the crowd is on their feet cheering on Red Solomon, as he makes his entrance.

*** Ally Winters ***
And his opponent, weighing in at 220 lbs standing 6' tall from Bangkok, Thailand he is "THE BANGKOK BRAWLER" RED SOLOMON!



The arena darkens, red strobe lights flash, mist rises from the ramp and ominous Gregorian chanting fills the air as Red Solomon steps out from behind the curtain then he outstretches his arms and pyro go off around him. He puts his hands together and bows to the fans as they shower him with equal part adulation and derision. Red races to the ring, leaps over the top rope and offers another bow to the crowd. He tests out the ropes and stretches before the match starts. Both Verve and Martinez leave the ring and the two men face off at one another. DJ drops his vest on the mat and everyone is wondering what to do with no referee.

*** Trace Bottoms ***
The air is hot and thick; you can cut it with a knife. You can feel the hate for each other.

*** Tommy Polo ***
Most definitely, babe. Red Solomon took the title off Styles by knockin’ his ass out, then Styles got pinned at a later Warzone in that Triple Threat. Red wanted to get his title back, but Styles prevented it. If you saw what Styles said, you'd know that he has every intent on killin’ Solomon, as he burned a replica Red Solomon like he was Papa Shango or somethin’.

*** The Virus ***
Exactly, he destroyed his enemy mentally on some voodoo shit, by saying "as long as I draw breath, you will never be UWA Champion as I will cost you that title every time." Although I'm sure he didn't want to get pinned, he did prevent Red from getting the title back. Now it's one on one with just about nothing holding them back. Hell, ain’t no referee to hold them back.

The bell rings and DJ snaps first, but Red blocks him and hits him with some rough chops following up with some Jeet Kun Do fists and kicks knocking DJ into the ropes. He whips him off the ropes and attempts to take him out with a Spinning Heel Kick, but DJ evades him, climbs up the ropes and comes back off with a Lionsault catching Solomon’s head, and taking him down with a Reverse DDT. Both men get to their feet at the same time and this time DJ attempts a hurricanrana, but he's countered with Red dropping him over the top rope. RS follows DJ out the ring, and the two men brawl, hitting each other with some rough fists. DJ gets the upper hand and whips Solomon towards the corner post, but he's countered and tossed into the guard rail. DJ lets out a low scream as he gets up and both men get into the ring.

DJ dives over, bringing fists into Solomon’s head, but he fights back and nails a Spinning Knife Edge Chop over his opponent’s chest. He releases him, stumbles around the ring, but as he turns to face Red once again, Red drops him with a Dropkick and DJ gets up again, this time he receives a diving Elbow Smash, but once more DJ gets up and this time he gets a Scoop Slam followed up by a Leg Drop over his throat. Red goes for a cover by instinct but there is no referee. Red stands up and brings the boots to his opponents face. DJ rolls out and attempts to sweep him, but Red jumps over and lands a football punt ala Randy Orton to DJs' face taking him down. Red runs at the ropes, jumps on the middle rope and comes off with a Lionsault.

*** The Virus ***
DJ Styles has been on the receiving end a lot early on. That'll eventually take it's toll on him. I just wonder what kind of game they're playing. I do remember playing a game like this before with someone else.

*** Tommy Polo ***
It was probably your boyfriend Cake Boy Mary. God knows how you two queens love fooling around.

*** The Virus ***
That was uncalled for Mr. Andreas. I didn't say shit about you being a Kebbler Elf demoted to Fudge Packer.

*** Tracie Bottoms ***
Can you two stop with all the gay jokes? They're getting stale and predictable. Just pay attention to the match. As much as you two hate gay people, you’re making the night even more gay, not with just Cake Boy Mary beating The Grand Mystique, but all these damn jokes. Hush up.

*** The Virus ***
You know, your girlfriend and a shotgun have a lot in common. Five cocks and they're loaded.

*** Tommy Polo ***
Your dick can’t get hard.

Tommy threats to punch Virus but neither man flinch. Tommy stands up and looks to Leon Roberts as if to say "What do you want to do now big man?" Red has been in solid control in the ring however. He has DJ Styles in the corner and is bringing fists to him and he dismounts with a Snap DDT off the top rope. He pulls his opponent to his feet and whips him into a corner. Red Solomon runs over with a high kick aimed straight for his head, but DJ catches him, and both Verve and Martinez jump up onto the apron. Red yells out, but doesn't drop and DJ manages to get a second low blow in before pushing him down. Verve drops down, and DJ jump up on the ropes and lands a Shooting Star Press. Martinez finally drops off herself.

DJ gets to one knee and repeated punches away at Red Solomon’s face. He gets up, bounces off the ropes and lands a running Swanton Bomb, he rolls up to his feet jumps onto the ropes and lands a Lionsault on Red Solomon. He gets him to his feet and gives him a couple of punches following through with a chop across his chest, pushes him into the ropes, RS comes at him and RS ducks down with DJ leap-frogging. RS bounces off the ropes, and this time DJ drops to his stomach and RS leaps over him, comes off the ropes and DJ catches him in a Stepover Toe Hold smashing Solomon’s face into the canvas. He scurries to his head, and applies a headlock squeezing his head like a zit. However, Red summons the strength from the crowd to continue on. He gets to his feet and elbows DJ twice, bounces off the ropes, attempts a High Crossbody Block, but DJ turns it into a Codebreaker, downing Red once more.

*** Tommy Polo ***
Lots of back and forth action between these guys. Alexia waited, INTENTIONALLY for this match-up before announcing the secret stipulation, that bitch. Very sneaky if you ask me. She knows she's going to get NOTHING but ‘A’ game from these men as they want to take out The Grand Mystique for the UWA Heavyweight Championship should he prevail over our number one contender Cake Boy Roberts.

*** The Virus ***
Oh Thomas, if only you knew WHO you're trying to fuck with. You can shake me, you've NEVER beaten me. You will NEVER win the big one or beat me for that matter. You have a better chance of Derek Wellings being your best friend in the whole wide world before you can top me. You’re nothin’ but a choke artist and a sham……..all bark and no bite to show for how long you’ve been wrestling.

*** Tommy Polo ***
I wouldn't be your friend if you were the last man on Earth, let alone Wellings. That Army Neck pencil pushing brown-noser can kiss my big Polish ass before I warm up to that cock smoker. He disappears for a couple weeks and now he thinks he's big because he put Jake Titan through several flaming tables? I've had more war scars to bare from my wrestling career than he has "prestigious" Military Awards. For God sakes, his wife is so ugly, her mammy threw her on the street and was charged for littering. Derek's so fucking dumb and stupid, she climbed over a glass wall just to see what’s on the other side. You Leon, you ain’t shit enough for me to even flush down the toilet. Hang around long enough and some dog will eat you.

*** Tracie Bottoms ***
Can you guys stop for just one solitary minute? For God's sake. JUST CALL THE MATCH!... then kill one another. That'll be a nice added bonus.

*** The Virus ***
Hey Tommy, did I ever tell you I saw Tracie in the men’s room, pissing standing up?

*** Tommy Polo ***
No, you never told me that, but I know your mother’s so dumb, she sold her car for gas money.

*** Tracie Bottoms ***
Watch the match, you two. Leon, you better keep my name out of your mouth.

*** The Virus ***
Too bad I can’t say the same for you.

Red is trying to get up as DJ stomps on his face and pulls him to his feet. He sends him to the ropes and hits a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. Outside the ring, Sherry walks around the ring and slides in a steel chair. DJ picks it up and measures Red before he gets up. When he turns around, DJ swings with the chair, but Red ducks, kicks DJ in the gut and hits an axe kick. The crowd starts to cheer and stomp for the fan favorite as he starts to get pumped up and picks up the chair. He looks at it then Verve gets up on the apron and Red throws the chair at Verve, hitting him in the face and then Red superkicks him off the apron. Sherry runs over to his aide and Red takes a few steps into the center of the ring, runs and then does a handspring somersault over the top rope and lands on both fiends. The crowd erupts at the big time move and Red gets up and plays to the crowd. *

*** The Virus ***
Yeah, yeah. Big move, but that’s not the person you have to beat.

*** Tommy Polo ***
By any means necessary. He knows those two clowns are going to interfere as long as there’s no referee, so he’s eliminating them from the equation.

*** The Virus ***
Focus too much on your distractions, and you’re bound to lose.

*** Tommy Polo ***
Look at the big brain on Leon. You’re still an inbred twit.

Red rolls back into the ring and goes after DJ with rib kicks and pulls him up, chops him into a corner and hits a double knee smash to the face. DJ snaps back into the corner as Red slaps his chest, then hip tosses him into the center of the ring. DJ springs to his feet and Red dropkicks him back down to the canvas. Red climbs to the top rope, but DJ kips up and takes the legs of Red out from under him. DJ quickly jumps up and executes a Frankensteiner. DJ then goes to the top rope and connects with a frog splash. DJ is on his knees and his eyes are rolling into the back of his head as if he’s in a trance. Verve and Sherry start pounding the mat to get him out of the trance. He returns and pulls Red to his feet. He whips him into a corner, hits a running shoulder thrust to the midsection, pulls him out by his hair and goes for the Hart Piledriver, but Red kicks out and reverses. DJ starts kicking to get free and reverses, then Red starts kicking and reverses and executes the Hart Piledriver on DJ. The crowd stands and cheers for Red as he’s trying to regain some advantage in this match. Verve slides into the ring and charges after Red, but he ducks a clothesline and connects with a superkick. Verve gets caught up in the ropes and Red looks at him and out to the crowd. Verve is begging off, but Red slaps him, hits the ropes and dropkicks Verve in the chest. Verve is still stuck in the ropes. When Red turns around, Sherry jumps off the top rope and Red catches him. He turns her up and powerbombs and then he piles Sherry on top of DJ. He releases Verve and then connects with a roundhouse kick to the head, which makes Verve fall on top of both Sherry and DJ. The crowd is going nuts as Red starts to ascend to the top rope.

*** Tommy Polo ***
Looks like ole Bangkok got this one in the bag.

*** The Virus ***
I bet you do like cocks in a bag. I knew you were a bitch.

*** Tommy Polo ***
Listen up here, I’m tired of your bitch comments.

*** The Virus ***
Then what you going to do ab----

*** Tracie Bottoms ***
GET ‘EM TOMMY!!!!

Polo throws his headset at Virus and then dives over Tracie and starts punching away at Virus. The crowd is now distracted by what’s going on at ringside. Polo grabs Virus and slings him across the commentator’s table. Virus gets up and stands next to the ring. Polo charges him and they brawl at ringside. Red looks down and then he’s torn on whether to dive on the two at ringside or finish off The Threesome. His hesitation allows Verve to get up and swat the legs of Red from under himself. Verve headbutts Red a few times then holds his face and shows his teeth. Virus and Polo continue to fight at ringside as Virus throws Polo into the ring steps and chokes him on the ground.

DJ gets up and sees Verve holding Red in place. He then tells Verve to leave the ring and he does, only to return with a table. He slides it into the ring and Sherry helps set it up. DJ then grabs the head of Red, climbs up with him and as Sherry and Verve are kissing wildly in front of the table, DJ executes an insane backflip DDT over Sherry and Verve and through the table. The crowd goes nuts and chanting………..
HOLY SHIT!!!!! HOLY SHIT!!!!! HOLY SHIT!!!!! HOLY SHIT!!!!! HOLY SHIT!!!!! HOLY SHIT!!!!! HOLY SHIT!!!!! HOLY SHIT!!!!! HOLY SHIT!!!!! HOLY SHIT!!!!! HOLY SHIT!!!!!

Shane Thomas runs down the aisle and slides into the ring. Verve decks him and throws him over the top rope, to the floor. Polo and Virus enter the ring and they continue to fight. DJ and Verve attack them and Sherry has a chair. She whacks Polo with the chair from behind into his balls, then Tracie slides into the ring and starts catfighting with her. Boobs are exposed and skirts fly up as the men in the crowd get a treat. Verve pulls Sherry away as DJ grabs Tracie and spews a red mist into her eyes. She drops to the mat and Virus gets to a knee and DJ kicks him in the face and hits him with Hand of Revenger (Styles Clash). Verve places the chair on the face of Red, while he’s still in the wreckage of the table and motions for DJ to go to the top rope. Jim Mills is racing to the ring, as DJ dives off the top with the Hand of Retribution onto the chair, squashing Red Solomon. Verve takes Sherry and they exit the ring and DJ makes the cover on Red: 1……………2……………3!!! The bell rings and the crowd boos.

*** Ally Winters ***
THE WINNER OF THE MATCH…………DJ STYLES!!!!

The crowd continues to boo and toss trash into the ring as The Threesome stand in the ring and assault Jim Mills. They punch him and kick him then throws him out of the ring. Verve picks up Polo and hits an Implant DDT onto the chair. Virus in then laid on top of Polo, head to head, then DJ takes the chair and bashes them with it several times. Both men are bleeding from the assault as PSA are rushing down to stop the mayhem. Red Solomon, Tommy Polo and Virus are all laid out in the ring, as Verve and DJ rush up the ramp and look at their work.

Warzone fades out as the camera shows the damage they caused with broken tables, bodies, blood, and chairs scattered about the ring.


END OF SHOW