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Post by Alexia Valentine on Nov 8, 2008 9:45:22 GMT -5
The camera opens up onto a a live video feed of Alexia Valentine. She's finishing typing on a laptop. She looks finishes what she is typing. Shuts the laptop and brings her attention to the camera.***ALEXIA VALENTINE***Ladies and gentlemen. I know we've had some rough beginnings; but all that ends today. The Ultimate Wrestling Association has opened for business, and that business is to stomp ass into the ground. The Ultimate Wrestling Association proudly welcomes you to the first show. Tonight history will be made. Her head looks left suddenly as both Sherry Martinez and "The Nature Boy" Jason Verve come in. Shelly is attired in a long black cowl with a cape and robe that surrounds her entire body. Her knee length dominatrix-esq boots are visible aside from her face. Verve however has a black suit on complete with a red tie. His sideburns that follow his jaw line are neatly trimmed and kept along with his mustache. The crowd cheers on as they watch the UltimateTron***ALEXIA VALENTINE***Ah, Mr. Verve and Ms. Martinez, how can I help you? ***SHERRY MARTINEZ***Why were we not put on the card? We signed up and we’re not included. The crowd boos as they just realize it themselves.***ALEXIA VALENTINE***Simple, Mr. Verve and yourself haven't done anything to prove that you are worthy of being on the UWA Warzone first show. If you want to make room for yourselves, go out and do something truly worthy of making yourself remembered. ***SHERRY MARTINEZ***All right Ms. Valentine... we'll do something to make you remember us. Just hold on tight and we'll do something memorable all right. Lets go Vervster. Sherry snaps her fingers and both of them leave as sudden as they came. Alexia has a semi puzzled look on her face.***ALEXIA VALENTINE***What a bunch of freaks. Incubi with Succubi... Geezers... I'm surrounded by idiots. Can’t say I didn't welcome this myself. At least The Masked Grappler has some common sense; unlike those two. Alexia freezes and turns around slowly to see The Masked Grappler behind her giving her lady hump a hearty squeezing. She looks at him with a look of "What the Hell!". Grappler on the other hand smiles and nods at her.***THE MASKED GRAPPLER***Grappler here. I haven' felt an ass that tight since my days on the U.S.S. Mermaider back in 1944 when I wrestled in London and fought in World War II. ***ALEXIA VALENTINE***What do you want Grappler? ***THE MASKED GRAPPLER***That’s The Masked Grappler to you, missy. ***ALEXIA VALENTINE***What is it? ***THE MASKED GRAPPLER***I’m a little embarrassed to ask you of this……. ***ALEXIA VALENTINE***What? ***THE MASKED GRAPPLER***I was wondering if you can give an old man a neck rub? ***ALEXIA VALENTINE***Grappler------ ***THE MASKED GRAPPLER***Mr. Masked Grappler. ***ALEXIA VALENTINE***I sign your damn paychecks. I’m not calling you Mr. Masked Grappler. AND NO, I’m not going to give you a neck rub. ***THE MASKED GRAPPLER***Well, my match is up next and I need to blow off some steam, you know, relax ole Grappler. I mean, a little penis rub has never hurt anyone. Grappler stands up and drops his tights. The glow of his schlong hypnotizes Ms. Valentine. Her eyes wide open….***ALEXIA VALENTINE***A penis THAT size, can get ANYTHING……….it wants. Grappler stands there with his hands on his hips, like a super hero, and Alexia gets up and is about to drop to her knees, but there’s a knock at the door and she snaps out of her trance then notices what she’s doing then slaps the living hell out of Grappler’s junk.***ALEXIA VALENTINE***NOW GET OUT OF MY OFFICE!!!!! YOU SICK, OLD FREAK!!!!She then mouths, “call me”, to Grappler as he’s pulling up his tights and hobbling out of the office and past DJ Styles, the challenger to the UWA Championship. ***THE MASKED GRAPPLER***She’s crazy. Stay away, she’s crazy. ***ALEXIA VALENTINE***GET OUT!!!!!!***DJ STYLES***You text me Ms. Valentine? ***ALEXIA VALENTINE***Yes I did and I want you to give those fans out there a good show. You were chosen to be the first contender for a reason. ***DJ STYLES***And what may that reason be? Interrupted by “The Revolution” Chris Cassidy.***CHRIS CASSIDY***Yeah, Ms. Valentine, what would that reason be? The two come nose to nose in front of Alexia.***ALEXIA VALENTINE***Good, you’re both here. Chris, DJ, DJ, Chris, the---- ***CHRIS CASSIDY***The Ultimate Wrestling Association Champion. ***DJ STYLES***I know who you are. And quite frankly, I don’t give a damn. That title, is coming home with me tonight. ***CHRIS CASSIDY***Over my dead, lifeless body. I earned this title by defeating 20 plus other men from all over the world. You haven’t done anything to deserve this belt. ***DJ STYLES***Yeah? Then, here’s how I’ll deserve it. DJ Styles grabs Chris Cassidy by the face and then pushes him back. Cassidy slams the belt down and is about to fight, but Alexia jumps in the way.***ALEXIA VALENTINE***BOYS!!!! BOYS!!!!! Behave yourselves. There’s a lady in the room. You two will settle this in the ring in the main event. DJ, you may leave and get ready for later this evening. Chris, stay right here. ***DJ STYLES***Fucking chump. That belt is mine. ***CHRIS CASSIDY***Screw you, you pussy. DJ leaves after flipping the bird to Cassidy. Alexia makes Cassidy sit down and explains to him…..***ALEXIA VALENTINE***Listen, tonight, you are defending that belt that you tossed on the ground on the very first broadcast of Warzone. I need you to be in tip top shape and focused to take on whomever it will be. DJ is your opponent and I want a stellar match from you two. Don’t go out there and look bad by losing the title in your first defense on the first show. Not only will you make yourself look bad, but you’ll make UWA look bad. There’s also a Triple Threat match booked for earlier in the evening, so who ever wins that, will be the new #1 contender to that title that you tossed to the ground. So if I were you, I’d be getting ready for my match and scouting the competition. You like competition, don’t cha? ***CHRIS CASSIDY***I love competition, as much as I love that sweet spot between a woman’s legs. ***ALEXIA VALENTINE***I like the sounds of that. But it won’t be my sweet spot you’ll be facing tonight. Now pick up my title, go to your locker room and prepare yourself for Warzone. Alexia Valentine looks at the camera and says…. ***ALEXIA VALENTINE***Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Ultimate Wrestling Association Warzone. The show opening montage starts. |
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Post by Alexia Valentine on Nov 8, 2008 9:46:11 GMT -5
* The crowd stands as Ally Winters enters the ring and is about to introduce the very first match in Ultimate Wrestling Association history. The crowd is clapping and cheering, anticipating the official start of the show. * Crowd – Ally Winters – WELCOME EVERYONE TO ULTIMATE WRESTLING ASSOCIATION WEDNESDAY NIGHT WARZONE!!!!* The crowd erupts as she puts the microphone up and begins the introductions. * Ally Winters – Introducing first, hailing from, Toronto, Ontario, Canada, and weighing in at 260 pounds…… THE DAGGER!!!!Jessica Swift – Hello everyone, welcome to Ultimate Wrestling Association Wednesday Night Warzone. I’m Jessica Swift, former professional wrestler and Warzone’s play by play commentator. Irvin Fury – And you all should know me……………Irvin “If there’s grass on the playing field, do you mind if I cop a feel? If your twat gets wet, do you mind if I --------- Jessica Swift – IRVIN!!!!!Irvin Fury - ----Fury. * Generic music begins to play as everyone is looking out at the stage for The Dagger to make his appearance. Nothing is happening, then someone notices a figure up in the rafters. They all look up and start booing as The Dagger is high up in the building, then he jumps down on a line and “fly’s” through the air similar to Superman and glides over the crowd. Everyone looks on and boos as Dagger clears the top rope and lands on his chest. He gets up and starts dusting off his knees as someone from the crowd tosses a soda into the ring and it explodes on Daggers face. * Jessica Swift – With that done, do you think the fans respect The Dagger in his debut match here in UWA? Irvin Fury – Hell no. You see this guy? He’s like a cross between Nacho Libre and that fat, retarded brother of yours that you don’t like hanging around. Jessica Swift – That’s not nice to say Fury. We could lose potential sponsors with comments like that. Irvin Fury – Potential sponsors can suck my------ Ally Winters – And his opponent, hailing from Cincinnati, Ohio, and weighing in at 234 pounds, he is the “Golden Era Classic”……………. THE MASKED GRAPPLER!!!! Your referee is Jim “Old School” Mills. * “Last Night When We Were Young” by Frank Sinatra plays for a while, giving an old school vibe off into the arena, settling everyone. Then the curtain moves a bit and then the masked superstar of the Golden Era of professional wrestling makes his way down the aisle. He is surrounded by fans that jump the railing and rush him because they love him. He walks his way up to the ring, looks at his opponent and walks up the steps. Before he enters, he wipes the soles of his boots off on the apron to show respect for the canvas and then enters the ring. He paces around the ring while slapping at his arms and shoulders and then he tests out the ropes, then waits in the corner for the bell to ring. * Irvin Fury – I bet when The Masked Grappler took his first crap, it was in the Garden of Eden. Jessica Swift – Boy, you pull no punches. Irvin Fury – Why should I? It’s not like he can hear me. Oh, my bad, he has one of those super hearing aids. He can probably hear me if I talked about him in another state. By the way, how big are your boobies? Jessica Swift – Well I never…… Irvin Fury – Never, eh? Mind if I pop your cherry? Jessica Swift – Get away from me you slimeball. * The bells rings and Grappler is slapping at his shoulders and forearms. Dagger roars and runs after Grappler with a double axe handle and misses. Grappler ducks under and circles around the ring. Dagger meets Grappler in the center of the ring and wants to do a test of strength. Grappler looks out at the crowd for approval and they all cheer, so Grappler puts his arm up and the two make contact with Dagger gaining the early advantage by twisting Grappler’s wrist back. * Jessica Swift – The old guy seems to be in trouble early in this match. Dagger is bigger and possibly stronger, but if it’s true about The Masked Grappler, that he’s the first wrestler EVER, then I’ll have to go with the experience in this one. Irvin Fury – I have experience, tons of it. Wanna find out? I’ll make you cream yourself without touching you. Jessica Swift – That’s right, you won’t be touching me. Is this how you do commentary, you talk dirty? Irvin Fury – I can talk while making love……if you want me to. Jessica Swift – Grrrrrr…… * Dagger has Grappler on his knees with full advantage of the test of strength and the crowd is starting to get behind Grappler by clapping and stomping. Grappler begins to feed off the crowd and begins to make his comeback. Dagger tries to force Grappler down, but Grappler headbutts Dagger to the gut then stands up, still in the clutches of Dagger. Grappler then falls backwards, and hits a monkey flip to Dagger to release the hold. Dagger gets to his feet and Grappler swings with a clothesline, but misses. Dagger pokes Grappler in the eye and then rakes his back. Dagger then hoists Grappler up and hits a back suplex. Dagger then steps on the face of Grappler and taunts to the booing crowd. * Irvin Fury – I like this Dagger guy…..sort of. He’s a real roughneck. A guy young children can look up to to beat the bully to become the bully. Jessica Swift – You’re a disgusting man, Fury. Dagger is being extremely disrespectful and you’re condoning his actions. Irvin Fury – Well, it’s apparent that this Golden Aged wrestler shouldn’t be in the ring with a young roughneck. He’s going to get killed or his pacemaker will stop working. * Dagger picks Grappler up, sends him to the ropes and hits a shoulder block. Dagger picks up Grappler into a suplex position then drops him gut first over the top rope. Grappler falls to the mat and Dagger drags him in and makes the cover: 1…………2……….Grappler gets a shoulder up. The crowd continues to stomp and clap for Grappler to make a comeback. Dagger then hammers Grappler across the back with a forearm and then hits a neckbreaker. Dagger plays to the crowd, taunting them and yelling. They throw stuff at him and he swats some of it away. Dagger then goes to pick up Grappler but gets caught with throat thrust. Dagger stumbles away as Grappler gets up to a knee. The crowd starts cheering louder as Grappler is “hulking up” and pumping his fists. Dagger goes to hit Grappler, but the blow is blocked and Grappler hits a European uppercut followed by a jawbreaker. Dagger is holding his face as Grappler makes it to his feet and goes for a sleeper hold, but Dagger uses his strength to flip Grappler over his back then holds onto his arms and tries to lock on his finisher, The Dagger Lock. * Jessica Swift – Dagger is going for his submission finisher, a full nelson, he calls The Dagger Lock. Irvin Fury – Well, as old school as that move is, I’d think The Masked Grappler would be the one to do that move. * Grappler is fighting the move and then counters with a butt to the gut. Dagger staggers away and Grappler then reverses the fortune by locking on his own full nelson. * Irvin Fury – The guy can hear me. Those hearing aids do work. What would you call that move since The Masked Grappler is doing it? Jessica Swift – How about The Grappler Lock? Irvin Fury – Clear that with him first. |
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Post by Alexia Valentine on Nov 8, 2008 9:47:04 GMT -5
* Dagger is struggling to break free of the full nelson, so he runs up the corner and then falls straight back, squishing Grappler. Dagger gets up in a daze and then goes for a side kick to the head of Grappler, but the kick is blocked and Grappler holds the leg and then stands up. Dagger is begging Grappler off but Grappler smashes Dagger’s knee with an elbow then hits a huge chop to the chest of Dagger. Dagger falls back into a corner, where Grappler positions himself and starts hitting rear end thrusts into the gut of Dagger. *
Irvin Fury – I bet a certain individual we’ll see later on this evening will enjoy that move.
* Dagger is holding his leg as Grappler grabs his head and headbutts him. Dagger leans against the ropes as Grappler hits a series of knife-edge chops, turning Dagger’s chest beet red. Grappler sends Dagger against the ropes then hits a traditional body slam. As Dagger lay on the mat, Grappler looks out to the crowd then, stomps on all of the legs, arms, body and then face of Dagger, completing the Garvin Stomp. Dagger is floundering around like a fish as Grappler goes for the pin: 1…………..2……….Dagger gets a shoulder up. Grappler stays on top of Dagger by picking him up and leans him in a corner. He hits another big knife-edge chop and Dagger fires back with a punch of his own. Grappler returns a chop, Dagger hits a punch, then a quick kneelift to the gut. Grappler doubles over in pain and Dagger hoists him up into a powerbomb position, but then Grappler grabs Dagger by the forehead with his hand and squeezes as Daggers starts screaming in pain. *
Jessica Swift – IRON CLAW!!!! IRON CLAW!!!! IRON CLAW!!!!
Irvin Fury – You’re JS, not JR.
Jessica Swift – The Masked Grappler has pulled the Iron Claw out of nowhere; amazing…..
* Dagger releases the hold and tries to break the hold of Grappler. Grappler steers Dagger to the center of the ring and squeezes even harder. Dagger is still yelling in pain as his skull is being compressed by the strongest hands in the world. Grappler then grabs the back of Dagger’s head as Dagger is starting to fade. He swings with a few punches but can’t connect with any and then he drops to a knee, then a second. The crowd is solely behind Grappler as he is putting the pressure on Dagger’s skull and then Dagger drops onto his back and tries to pull Grappler’s hands from his head but it’s impossible. Dagger is starting to stop fighting and then his shoulders hit the mat: 1…………………..2………………………3!!!! The bell rings with Grappler still holding on to the Iron Claw. *
Ally Winters – THE WINNER OF THE MATCH VIA PINFALL………….THE MASKED GRAPPLER!!!!!
* Jim Mills pulls Grappler from Dagger and then is chased around the ring by Grappler, holding the Iron Claw to him. Mills then cautiously reaches for Grappler’s arm to raise it in victory and does so to a cheering crowd. *
Jessica Swift – What an amazing starting match for Ultimate Wrestling Association. The Masked Grappler is victorious in the opening match against The Dagger with his world famous Iron Claw.
Irvin Fury – The stories I’ve heard of that man and those hands………dangerous.
Jessica Swift – Maybe I’ll have to see for myself.
Irvin Fury – What can that old fart do for you that I can’t?
Jessica Swift – I’ve heard that it’s not just his hands that are extremely strong. Whew, makes me sweat just thinking about it.
Irvin Fury – What? What? What is it?
Jessica Swift – Don’t worry about that. It’s for ladies only. You can worry about this person that’s coming up next.
Irvin Fury – Who’s that?
Jessica Swift – Cake Boy Mary……….
Irvin Fury – That’s why I saw all that glitter in the back.
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Post by Alexia Valentine on Nov 8, 2008 9:47:25 GMT -5
* Cake Boy Mary is next to the men’s locker room doing obscene stretches and dances. He’s standing on one leg and lifting the other up around his own head, holding the heel with his hand. He balances himself and does a split down in front of the doorway. Wrestlers such as Jason Verve step over Cake Boy and ignore him. When The Dagger goes into the locker room, Cake Boy stands up and pinches The Dagger’s ass. Dagger turns around and is about to hit Cake Boy, but he doesn’t and spits on the ground that Cake Boy stands on. * Cake Boy Mary – Well excuse me for introducing myself………..asshole. Oh and great match out there.............loser.* As Cake Boy now bends over to continue his obscene stretches, Alexia Valentine walks over to him and slaps him on the ass. * Cake Boy Mary – OHHH!!! That was powerful. Do it agai------oh, hi Ms. Valentine.* Alexia doesn’t look pleased. * Alexia Valentine – Mary, are you harassing my wrestlers again?Cake Boy Mary – Well no Ms. Valentine, I’m just introducing myself. The entire time I’ve been in UWA, I haven’t made a friend and since tonight, everyone is here under one big roof, I’d like to conduct my own little meet and greet.Alexia Valentine – Mary, you’re standing in front of the men’s locker room, doing your nasty, flimsy, homosexual splits and God knows what else you’re doing. You’re disturbing my talent.Cake Boy Mary – From the looks of things, the only talent around here are those two floatation devices that you so happy-go luckily display for all these mens to see and if the price is right, your extra strong jaw muscles. Yep, those boys and your lips are the most talented things in this building right now.Alexia Valentine – I can’t believe you just said that. You have the nerve. Have you looked at yourself in the mirror lately?Cake Boy Mary – Yes, and I love what I see. And I have plenty of people who will agree……..I am FA-BO-LISS!!Alexia Valentine – God, you’re so……..so………..Cake Boy Mary – Say it baby, say it. Tell me that Mary is glamorous and fab...Alexia Valentine - ….so…..gay.* Cake Boy Mary looks surprised. * Cake Boy Mary – I wouldn’t call being flamboyant and faboliss, being gay.Alexia Valentine – Mary, you’re gay. And I bet if I had a 10 inch pole right now, you’ll want to practice your buoyancy by sitting right on it and doing what you do in the dark.* Cake Boy snaps his fingers, twists and snaps his neck. * Cake Boy Mary – You got that right honey.*Alexia has a disgusted look on her face. * Alexia Valentine – Yeah, OK, see you around. Leave my wrestlers alone.Cake Boy Mary – I’ll be right here honey, meeting and greeting because if you won’t entertain them, who will?* Just as Cake Boy lays on his back and places both legs behind his head to start smacking his genitalia, Lizard, TinMan, and Spirit walk up to him. They all look down at him and don’t say a word. * Cake Boy Mary – What are you guys looking at? See something you like……..hmmmm?Lizard – I couldn’t help but notice that your tail is in the front of your body.Cake Boy Mary – My tail? My tail has always been behind me, and often in front of many men.Lizard – No, I mean your tail is in front of your body. It is rather intriguing to look at.* Cake Boy looks down and now knows what Lizard is referring to. * Cake Boy Mary – Ohhh, I get it. You like my length. I don’t get any complaints, it’s a deep oil dredger. I’ll slip your spine if you let me.* Lizard licks his tongue. * Lizard – I sort of like that idea.TinMan – No, no. Not fair. You can’t have fun, unless the homies get some. I’ve had my watchful eye on you for a while Mary and I think it’s time to share my oil with you. Would you like for me to put some oil on your back?Cake Boy Mary – Only after I back it up on you TinMan, and make you work for that oil. I don’t want you to just give it to me.Lizard – So when have you ever been up to giving away opportunity for the sake of others satisfaction?TinMan – I always give opportunity, just that I always want to come out on top.Lizard – Do you need a ladder? Seems like you always need a ladder to jump off of to put the icing on the cake.TinMan – Don’t hate my style. When was the last time you did anything spectacular……….2007? No let me take that back, later than that, because when you were “on top”, you had no one to conquer and avoided competition at all costs.Spirit – Guys, shut up. We are here to get some sweet fudge from Cake Boy. You two can discuss who was better “on top” at a later time.Cake Boy Mary – Uhhhh, why do you look that way?Spirit – Me? Because I am Spirit, and I can disappear and reappear when I feel the need. I break all the rules of realism in the world of e-wrestling.Cake Boy Mary – I love the glow around your body…….it sort of……..turns me on.* Cake Boy starts thrusting his pelvis repeatedly and walks towards Spirit. Spirit opens his arms and glides toward Cake Boy but goes right through him. Cake Boy looks astonished. * Cake Boy – What happened Spirit, don’t you want me?Spirit – I think……..I think……..I’m disappearing again?Lizard – Oh boy.* Spirit starts to fade away as TinMan sneaks behind Cake Boy and pinches his butt. * TinMan – Tag, you’re it.* TinMan runs off. * Cake Boy Mary – Ohhh, I love a man who’s full of bullshit and games. When I catch you Man of Tin, I’m going to open your rear hatch and invade the bowels of your ship.* Cake Boy skips after TinMan and leaves Lizard behind shaking his head. * Lizard – Makes me wonder why I even bother with that liquid.* Cake Boy leans back in and kisses Lizard on the cheek. * Cake Boy Mary – Come on little green guy……..come with Mary.Lizard – Looking at you switch away, I really do plan to come alright.* Lizard licks his tongue again and the scene ends. * |
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Post by Alexia Valentine on Nov 8, 2008 9:52:09 GMT -5
UWA Warzone returns from a commercial break. The camera opens onto Jake Titan walking into the backstage area of UWA Warzone for some coffee.
The UWA's resident gangster is getting a cup of coffee. However, the UWA Heavyweight Champion "The Revolution" Chris Cassidy pushes him aside to get some coffee for himself, the coffee spills onto Jake's chest.***JAKE TITAN***
Yo' nigga, what the Hell man? Ever hear of "excuse me bro?"Chris Cassidy laughs at Jake and holds the title closer to himself.***JESSICA SWIFT***Ugh oh... NOT good. He blatantly disrespected a man everyone fears.***IRVIN FURY***What a great extra bonus! That self serving prick "The Revolution" Chris Cassidy is getting his! Thank you Jake Titan!***CHRIS CASSIDY***Yo' BRO ‘The Revolution’ has arrived in UWA. You see, Chris Cassidy is a very busy man. He shows up when he wants; He gets what he wants; He doesn't give a shit... Jake Titan punches Chris in his mouth to shut him up. He grabs his coffee and spills it on Chris' face.***JAKE TITAN***
Hey nigga! Now you got a fight. You don't disrespect UWA or me.Jake grabs Chris by a foot, he tries to squirm away but Jake steps on his "boys" as the crowd watching on the UltimateTron cringes. Fury looks away and buries his head in Jessicas' cleavage, thanks to her low cut shirt.***IRVIN FURY***I don't want to leave this room...Jessica pulls his head up and pushes him back to his seat. He looks at the camera with a shit eating grin. She grabs his wrist and twists it on him. He mouths "ouch" but tries to no sell it.***JESSICA SWIFT***Only warning, leave my sweater kittens alone.The camera returns to Jake grabbing a ceramic coffee mug, slams it against Chris' head. He screams out and Jake slaps him across the face for being a bitch. He tries to crawl away but the Gangster grabs him by the scruff of his neck and his shirt. He grabs him and tosses him into a vending machine, the plastic face shatters and Jake grabs a piece of the jagged plastic and begins to cut his forehead open. Chris swings a fist a few times at him, but misses each time. Jake manages to get blood from his forehead, then he tosses the plastic piece aside, and grabs him by his belt and shirt to drag him over to a table with food.
Jake tells the people gathered around eating the continental dinner to move away, as he sides Chris over the table and clears the top off, further destroying the UWA Champion. Chris begins gagging as a shrimp is lodged in his throat. His assaulter steps on his stomache, causing him to cough the shrimp out. He forces The Revolution onto his feet, sets him up in a Death Valley Driver position, carries him to the loadin dock area. He looks down to see a dumpster filled with cardboard boxes and a television/production truck next to it. Cassidy tries to fight out, but Jake hoists Chris up and over his head and down into the dumpster. Jake looks down at the fallen Champion.***JAKE TITAN***
That's 134th Street bitch! Courtesty of New York’s own Jake Titan!The fans cheer loudly at the reference of New York Citys' own suburb of Harlem. Jake climbs to the top of the nearby television/production truck, looks down, raises his hands up in victory, then he lowers them and thinks.***JESSICA SWIFT***Oh no... don't do it Jake! He's the UWA Champion!***IRVIN FURY***What's he going to do? Something crazy like New Jack?Jake jumps off the truck with an amazing 450 Splash! The crowd is on their feet cheering on Jake. ***UWA CROWD*** ***IRVIN FURY***What the Hell? That's bull crap!Jake raises up from the dumpster and looks at the camera.***JAKE TITAN***
FURY! I'm coming for you next, you inbreed motherfucker!***JESSICA SWIFT***Way to go Irvin, honey. You've pissed him off. He must have heard you from the truck... Where'd you go?Jessica looks to see Irvin’s chair is spinning and an outline of his body in the air. She looks around including under the table for him, but Fury is no where to be seen.***JESSICA SWIFT***We'll be back after this message folks. Fade to a commercial. |
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Post by Alexia Valentine on Nov 8, 2008 9:55:11 GMT -5
UWA Warzone returns from another commercial break. Irvin Fury is still missing from the announce table. Jake Titan has filled in his place. kinda smiles at the camera as he lets his body take over and stop the bleed on its own. ***JAKE TITAN***What's crackin' yo? It's the Gangster Jake Titan with the lovely dame from Alabama, the single and attractive Ms. Jessica Swift yo'.***JESSICA SWIFT***Thank you very much Mr. Titan.***JAKE TITAN***No problem baby. What's poppin' fo' our next match?***JESSICA SWIFT***Lets let our own Ms. Winters tell us?Ally stands in the center of the ring. Several guys call out her name, and she bows slightly in their direction.***ALLY WINTERS***LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! Have you been having a great night so far?The crowd erupts in cheering. One guy is heard screamin "SHOW US YOUR TITS!" Ally plays him off.***ALLY WINTERS***Wait for Hustler or Penthouse to call boys. Now are you ready for our next match?The crowd erupts again.***ALLY WINTERS***The following match is scheduled for one fall, and it is a Triple Threat match, for the #1 contendership to the UWA Heavyweight Championship! Your referee for this match is Maverick Michaels.
Making his way first, weighing in at 340 lbs, measuring in a 6'8", from Athens, Greece, THANATOS!"Judas Mesias Theme" begins playing over the PA system. Many believe it's Judas Mesias however they notice that it isn't. The man that walks out has purple hair hidden behind a red and black mask with a matching red and black flame-esq leather suit. The visible skin of his arms and neck are very pastey and the gothic chains hanging over his body don't help bring a Mr. People Person to anyone’s mind. Several people causing others to join in. He looks around and ignores them.
Thanatos climbs up the ring apron and begins to disrobe down to a bare chest and his leather pants. Howver his mask remains on. Jake Titan looks absurd at the show going on in front of him.***JAKE TITAN***What the fuck? These people paid good money to be apart of history and they see this shit? What the Hell is going on Jessie.***JESSICA SWIFT***That is Thanatos, a former JWA:EWA World Tag Team, Tag Team, 24/7 Extreme, HaRdCoRe, "X" Division and Intercontinental Champion. ALL of those from JWA:EWA. At least that's what it says on my papers. I don't know. Fury would know more than I would. They paid to see everything, and that includes him.***JAKE TITAN***Well I'll get up from my seat and ruin his shit if a opponent doesn't come out and stop him.Suddenly the lights go out, no music plays. The lights stay out for several minutes. The lights eventually come back on after two minutes, and The Angel appears in the ring.***ALLY WINTERS***One of his opponents, from Sheffield, England. Weighing in at 230 lbs, measuring in at 6'3" tall. He is "UNBREAKABLE" ANGEL!The two circle one another for a few moments. But don't attack until the third man shows up.***JAKE TITAN***This dick head is also a disappear/reappear act? What the shit!***JESSICA SWIFT***That's former JWA:EWA Global Champion "Unbreakable" Angel right there for you Jake. Again, reading what I got. Don't hit me.***JAKE TITAN***I won't hit it, I don't hit white hoes. I'm only interested in the honeys Jessie. You're a cute southern belle, but I'm just not interested.The two look too see a man dresses in a gorilla suit walks out from the entrance in a hot pink bikini runs out with a baseball bat slides into the ring. He hits Angel over the head then he hits Thanatos as well. Angel rolls out of the ring with look of terror on his face. He points and screams at the Monkey and stays outside not wanting to do anything.***JAKE TITAN***Oh shit! That's Coco, she... he... it must be pissed off. Watch out Jessie, this could get disgusting.Coco bashes Thanatos several times over his body. He convulses each time he is struck. Coco begins howling loudly much to the entertainment of the crowd. Several people jump on their seats and cheer Coco on by acting like monkeys themselves and howling at the top of their lungs. Coco finally drops the bat after spiking it like a football on Thatantos' head. Coco grabs Thanatos, scoop slams him once... twice... three times. Coco then does a Monkey Flip on Thanatos off the mat into a corner. He acts more outraged and begins to fire away fists and stomps over Thanatos.***JAKE TITAN***HAHAHA! That Coco really makes me laugh. I like it already. These assholes didn't think it was in good taste to hype their match. Nice job for helping out Coco.***JESSICA SWIFT***This night has been historic, that was great.Suddenly Irvin Fury comes back out with Tommy Polo and three members of the Polo Security Force. Fury walks up to Jake Titan and points at him. Fury is over heard screaming "Get him the Hell out of here! He's in my seat! He's threatened me, get him the fuck out!" Tommy Polo moves over to grab Jake. However he takes off his head set, stands up and moves away first himself. He waves good bye to Jessica who waves good bye to him. The crowd boos Fury getting rind of Titan for himself. However Jake pretends to make a jump at Fury, and he pulls Polo in front of him. Polo raises an eyebrow looking at Fury. Jake begins to laugh and the four escort him out. Fury picks up his head phones and sits back down next to Jessica.***IRVIN FURY***Miss me sweetie?***JESSICA SWIFT***NOPE!Jake Titan with Polo Security Force leaves through the curtain, however a moment after a scrawny but with some muscle mass. However his frail size does not scream "Wrestler" especially since his skin is VERY pale. He has untidy black hair sticking up in odd angles as he runs down to the ring, slides in. Coco move away as it allows the man known only as "Francis Bailey" in. He crawls over and covers Thanatos. Maverick calls for the match to being finally. He drops down and begins counting ONE!... TWO!... THREE! Micheals calls for the bell. Coco and Francis hug and begin to party in the ring.***IRVIN FURY***Monkey? You made it back from The Creeper?***JESSICA SWIFT***Monkey? I think you mean Coco and it's an gorilla, not a monkey, Fury.***IRVIN FURY***Either way, I chose the wrong time to get back here. Angel is freaking out over Coco and I saw it? What the Hell! We're going to a commercial!Fade to black for a commercial. |
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Post by Alexia Valentine on Nov 8, 2008 9:55:52 GMT -5
As the crowd gets over that crazy and unpredictable Triple Threat match, won by Francis Bailey, they begin to settle as the ring crew is clearing the ring and preparing for the main event between DJ Styles and Ultimate Wrestling Association Champion, Chris Cassidy, then suddenly………
“Ain’t No Make Believe” by Stonefree Experience begins to play and the crowd jump back up and start applauding. There are a mixture of boos in the crowd, but a majority of the crowd cheer. Out from behind the curtain comes none other than “The Menace” Tommy Polo. He doesn’t have his girlfriend and valet, Tracie Bottoms with him, but he has a microphone in hand.**JESSICA SWIFT**“ Here comes the guy everyone loves to hate.” **IRVIN FURY**“ I don’t hate the guy. If you’ve been on the road with this guy for over 5 years, you’ll know what he’s about. He is a team player, but when he gets into that ring, it’s a different story. Guys hate him because he’s so good.” **JESSICA SWIFT**“ Suga, lookin’ at his resume, I don’t see any World Championships.” **IRVIN FURY**“ The guy’s been blackballed. People hate to hear the truth and he tells the truth and nothing less. That’s why he doesn’t have any World Championships on his resume.” Polo stands on stage for a second to look out at the crowd, then he makes his way down the ramp and aisle. As he walks down the aisle, explosions go off behind him and then he enters the ring. He hops up on the corner and starts flexing. The crowd breaks out into a chant……….**JESSICA SWIFT**“ The fans sure know how to show their appreciation.” **IRVIN FURY**“ He doesn’t care about the fans; only himself, money, and his woman………..of the hour.” Polo flexes and gets down from the corner and paces around the ring. He stops at the ropes and looks out at someone in the crowd. **IRVIN FURY**“ Oh my God, it’s him.” **JESSICA SWIFT**“ Who? Who?” **TOMMY POLO**“ Ah buddy. Long time no see. You look a little chubby there. You look worse than I last remember ya. Been a while since you been in the ring? Or have you just been out manipulatin’ people and gatherin them around like a flock of mindless birds so you can do absolutely nothin’ with them?” **JESSICA SWIFT**“ Who is he talking to?” **IRVIN FURY**“ I’m not saying the son of a bitches name. If you want to know, do some research. That bastard is a conniving, dirty, slick, mind bending son of a bitch. I refuse to give him face time on this program.” **JESSICA SWIFT**“ It sounds like you’ve just described Tommy Polo.” **TOMMY POLO**“ You know it’s always been somethin’ between you and I that was never resolved and even now, you have that look in your eye as if you’re feelin’ froggy. I know you’re a long winded crap shooter, but one thing was written on the wall, you were never able to beat me. Regardless of how much of a conspiracy you drum up, I am and will always be better than you.” The unnamed guy just sits there and then he flips Polo the bird.**TOMMY POLO**“ Ohhhhh, now you’re lettin’ everyone know that’s what you wanted to do to me so many years ago. You wanted to get up in this and I just wasn’t havin’ it. You wasn’t worth my time and still not worth my time. You sit there like the bitch that you are and enjoy the rest of the show, you worthless, self destructive, sheep leadin’, cumbucket of a wannabe wrestler. Stay outta my territory you piece of shit.” In the back, Derek Wellings is looking on via a monitor.**IRVIN FURY**“ I couldn’t have said it any masterfully.” Polo switches mic-hands and scowls at the guy in the crowd.**TOMMY POLO**“ Now, onto business. I’m here tonight to welcome and thank every one for attending tonight’s Ultimate Wrestling Association Warzone show. That’s right, I’m thankin’ you people for spendin’ your money to see this upcomin’ federation take off. Don’t worry about me, Valentine hired me as Head of Security, so in case any assholes like that piece of shit in the front row……” Points to the guy he was yelling at earlier.**TOMMY POLO**“ Decides to get outta line, then I’ll come down to this ring, you’re your ass, and throw you out into the street in front of speedin’ cars.” **JESSICA SWIFT**“ Tommy Polo sounds like he needs a hug, or a friend. He sounds so angry, and the cursing, is it necessary?” **IRVIN FURY**“ He gets plenty of hugs, kisses and much more from his female friends. How about we become friends so we can hug, kiss, and do much more?” **JESSICA SWIFT**“ Suga, you need to get a life. I’ll never hug, kiss, or give you the sense of satisfaction of getting with me. And if you dare get close to me, my wrestling background will show its purpose.” **IRVIN FURY**“ Hey, hey……truce.” **JESSICA SWIFT**“ I don’t like you.” **TOMMY POLO**“ That’s right, I’m not on the active roster because most of you muthafuckas think I’ll take over shit and that I’m bein’ helped politically. So, as far as the UWA goes, I’ll be makin’ appearances at each show, but in the capacity of an enforcer and security. You get outta line, you WILL see me, whether you like it or not.” **TOMMY POLO**“ So it’s like this, tonight is a historic night for UWA and I want you all to sit down, shut up and enjoy the rest of the show. If you fuck up, I’ll come down there to put my boot in your mouth.” **JESSICA SWIFT**“ Real tough guy to threaten fans. He’s obviously bigger than most people in this building and he has to threaten them with physical harm to get his way…..he’s a real winner.” **IRVIN FURY**“ For as long as I’ve known him, he’s been a winner.” **TOMMY POLO**“ So to Ms. Valentine, the night’s almost over and I want my money in my hand before I leave tonight. You got what you wanted, I’m not goin’ ta screw up your plans to run a successful federation by bein’ on the active roster, I got what I wanted because I’m gettin’ paid like I was on the active roster, so we are even. I’ll do my job and you stay outta my way when I do it. I don’t wanna hear ya trap either when someone sues you for somethin’ I did. You know my history and we signed a contract that you can’t make me liable for anythin’ that I do, if provoked. So I’m about to head out of this ring right now and let the championship match between two men I know I can beat take place. So screw you all, and you’ll be seein’ me again. One man’s hate leads to another man’s fate.” ”Ain’t No Make Believe” starts playing again as Polo exits the ring. He’s heading up the ramp and just before he goes through the curtain, Derek Wellings makes an appearance and stands in Polo’s way. The two have a stare down then they come nose to nose and talking crap to each other. The tension is in the air.**JESSICA SWIFT**“ Whoa nelly……these two are at it again. Wherever they go, there’s trouble.” **IRVIN FURY**“ This here fans is what a feud is about. They have encountered each other in previous federations, but were not allowed to blossom the encounters. Here in UWA, a true blood letting is possible.” **JESSICA SWIFT**“ How can that be when Polo is not on the roster?” **IRVIN FURY**“ Have you ever heard of a one night stand?” **JESSICA SWIFT**“ Yes I have, and it won’t happen with you and me.” **IRVIN FURY**“ Well, it could happen between Derek Wellings and Tommy Polo, right here in Ultimate Wrestling Association.” The two are head to head like two angry bulls, ready to charge. Eyes blood shot red; Polo rips off his sunshades and slam them to the ground and gets ready to fight, but Alexia Valentine comes out.**ALEXIA VALENTINE**“ TOMMY POLO, DEREK WELLINGS!!!!! THIS IS NOT THE TIME AND PLACE FOR YOU TWO TO HAVE A PRIVATE SAUSAGE PARTY!!!!!” **IRVIN FURY**“ I have those.” **JESSICA SWIFT**“ That’s because no one comes to your private parties, so you end up entertaining yourself.” **IRVIN FURY**“ There may be some truth in that.” **ALEXIA VALENTINE**“ TOMMY, you were brought here to do a job…………NOW DO IT!!!! Get out of here before I fire your ass.” The crowd gets silent. Polo picks up his glasses and walks past Wellings, after bumping shoulders with him. Wellings is about to charge after him…..**ALEXIA VALENTINE**“ NO!!! Get back here….Derek……get back.” …..but Alexia stops him by grabbing his arm.**DEREK WELLINGS**“ WHAT THE FUCK, VALENTINE?!!! LET ME GO, I’M GONNA WHUP HIS ASS!!!!” **ALEXIA VALENTINE**“ You run after him and you’re fired. I’m the boss around here and if you don’t like taking orders from a skirt…….I got something for you to suck on………….” **IRVIN FURY**“ She has one of those?” **JESSICA SWIFT**“ If she did, I’d bet it’d be bigger than yours.” **DEREK WELLINGS**“ What the fuck would that be…….boss?” **ALEXIA VALENTINE**“ …..a pink slip. Now get in the back and I don’t want to hear nothing from you for the rest of the night.” Wellings leaves to the back, and Alexia looks back at the crowd and says…….**ALEXIA VALENTINE**“ And now, our main event……….after this commercial break.” |
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Post by Alexia Valentine on Nov 8, 2008 9:58:15 GMT -5
The show returns from commercial and the camera is on Jessica Swift and the returned Irvin Fury. Fury looks around to make sure that Jake Titan isn't sneaking up on him. He grabs his scotch and downs a little. He offers some to Jessica who rejects it, then notices the camera is on.***Jessica Swift****Lowly*Fury, we're on. *Her voice returns to normal* Howdy ya'll! Welcome back to UWA Warzone!***Irvin Fury***Are you ready Swift?***Jessica Swift***Of course! Ladies and Gentleman! It is time for our very first UWA Heavyweight Championship defense!***Irvin Fury***Oh... I wasn't talking about that. I knew you were ready for the Main Event, i was talking about us going on a date.***Jessica Swift***Fury... don't make me go Submarine.lAlly Winters is standing in the ring. She has a note card in her hand and begins reading.Ally WintersLadies and Gentlemen, due to an attack earlier this evening, Chris Cassidy has been informed NOT to wrestle. However my executive decision of Ms. Alexia Valentine and Mr. Chris Cassidy himself, they have decided he WILL compete and defend his title. So ladies and Gentlemen, children of all ages. Let the first UWA Championship defense begin! You referee for this match is Jim "Old School" Mills.
Comming to the ring first, he is the challenger. Weighing in at two hundred and twenty pounds, standing in at fivce feet and ten inches tall, from Martin, Georgia he is "AWESOME" DJ STYLES!"Learning to Fly" by the legendary British rock band Pink Floyd hits the PA System, and the fans are on their feet going nuts. A white man walks out wearing red and black boots with "STYLES" written on teh front of both boths, two black elbow pads, tapped wrists, red and black knee pads with red speds with "DJ STYLES" on his hips and a matching red sleeveless jacket with DJ STYLES written over the left kidney area walks out form behind the UWA curtain. He smiles and before everyone to see. He spreads his arms out and legs shoulder width apart and lets out a ferocious roar. He stiffens his right hand to a fist and beats on his chest on his way to the ring looking at the fans reaching out to touch him. He slaps their hands as he walks by. DJ climbs up the apron and jumps over the top rope. He jumps up on a turnbuckle, spreads his arms out again and yells at the crowd who show him love back. He takes off his jacket and tosses it at Jessica who grabs it.***Irvin Fury***I hate him. Look at a kid as young as he is. If he wins the UWA Championship tonight, I'll... I'll... I'll donate $1,000 to charity.***Jessica Swift***I'll go on that bet. I'll bet you one romatic date that DJ Styles losers. But if I win, you donate a thousand bucks to charity.***Irvin Fury***Deal.Irvin and Jessica shake hands. DJ stands in the ring jogging in place shaking his muscles loose.Ally WintersComming to the ring weighing in at two hundred and fifty three pounds, measuring six feet and four inches tall. From Dublin, Ireland he is the UWA Heavyweight Champion, CHRIS "THE REVOLUTION" CASSIDY!"Firestarter" by Prodigy hits the PA system and the crowd begins to boo. He walks out from behind the curtain wearing no shirt but the word "REV" written on his chest and large tribal tatoo coverin almost his entire body. He has black elbow pads, with knee high red boots with white faces, his wrists and fingers taped. He is wearing red/black/white spandex pants ala Jericho. His dark red hair covering his eyes ala Chris Sabin complete with a red beard like Jeff Hardy. He wears the UWA Heavyweight Championship around his waist and looks at his opponent in te hring.
He favors his entire torso as he enters thanks to Jake Titans attack earlier in the evening. He climbs into the ring slowly and stands in front of his challenger. He takes the title off and hands it to Jim. He holds the title in one hand and begins talking to them as the music dies down. The fans are too loud ot pick up Jims' words. DJ sticks his hand out, and Chris slaps it away getting some heat from the audience. Jim raises the title up and shows everyone in the cfowd the title. He finally hands the title to Ally who keeps it by her and the fight doctor, Dr. David Brown.***Jessica Swift***ALL RIGHT! Everyone is in the ring, and already Cassidy has disrespected his opponent. That's NO going to buy him any favors tonight. FURY, shut up.Fury who was about to comment doesn't make his comment. DJ and Chris snap at each other and lock up. DJ manages to toss Chris back into the ropes, he comes off with an clothesline attempt, but DJ jumps up and hits Drop Kick. Cassidy gets back to his feet and DJ hits him with a Scoop Slam. The crowd is already on their feet, and Cassidy is on the recieving end. He attempts a Pele Kick, only to get one from DJ Styles instead. He spins around in a 360 and DJ hits his "The Revolution" with a Gutbuster. He holds his chest, but DJ grabs his arms and hits him with a Snap Suplex. He moans loudly and tries to get to a corner crawling. DJ runs over, and nails a dropkick in his rib cage. Chris rolls over, and his opponent flips on him with a Rolling Thunder ala Rob Van Dam. He leans back and goes for the pin but the UWA Champ kicks out.at twol***Jessica Swift***The champ gets out of that at two. This already looks bad for him.***Irvin Fury***Speaking of looking bad, that shirt looks terrible. It would look great on my floor in my hotel room. Why don't we give it a whirl submarine girl?***Jessica Swift***Doubtful Irvin.DJ gives him several fists to the face and brings him to the center of the ring. Cassidy begins getting to his feet as DJ gives him some fists to the head. Cassidy tries to take him over with an Armdrag but DJ Counters with an Exploder Suplex almost knocking out Cassidy. He scurries to a corner but DJ drags him out and sets him up and nails another Death Valley Driver on him. DJ looks around, taunts his opponent before he goes outside the ring, while looking on the inside, he jumps onthe ropes and nails a Spring Board Shooting Star Legdrop getting a huge reaction from the crowd again. He covers once more and gets a two count.
DJ stands up and begsin stomping on his chest before finally letting up and allow Chris back to his feet so he can jump onto the ropes behind him and nail a Backflip Tornado DDT. He doesn't cover this time however. He instead grabs Cassidy and puts him in a corner, and attempts to Superplex him. As he gets ready to take off, Cassidy pushes him off. DJ lands rough on his back.***Irvin Fury***I can smell defeat in the air! Looks like we're goign on a date warm legs! I can't wait!***Jessica Swift***Dont' count your chickens before they hatch darlin'.When DJ gets to his feet, Chris comes off with a Frankensteiner attempt. He holds up and begings to punch away at DJs' head. he goes to finish the move, but DJ Powerbombs him instead. The pops loudly once more.UWA Crowd***Irvin Fury***NO! YOU SHUT UP! COME ON CHRIS!DJ kicks his opponents leg and he kind of stirs. He grabs him by and arm and his head, sets him up for a Piledriver. However he bends over, brings his knees over his shoulders, locks Chris' Armys around his arms and falls face forward on top of Chris Cassidy! He he flips him over onto his back, and with feet holding down his arms. He connects with a Clashing Styles [/b]. Jim drops down. ONE!... TWO!...THREE! Jim signals for the bell. Styles pushes Cassidy onto his chest in defeat, and stands up with both arms raised high. Jim grabs the UWA Heavyweight Championship from Ally. He places the title around the Champions' waist and the both raise his hand in victory and walk around the ring.[/i] ***Jessica Swift***HA HA! PAY UP BITCH! Give me ma money! Don't make me go and find Jake Titan!***Irvin Fury***GrrrIrvin reaches into his pocket and grabs a check book. He begins writing a check for Jessica to bring to a charity group for him.Ally WintersHERE IS YOUR WINNER! AND NEW UWA HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION BY PINFALL! "AWESOME" DJ STYLES!Dj jumps over the top ropes, lands on his feet and walks to the crowd and begin shaking hands with them. Many pat him on the back for a job well done. The camera begins fading to black.[/center] END OF SHOW |
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